Cloud Nine- Chapter 22: Not What I Planned

Chapter 22

Serenity

My heart thumped lightly in my chest as I waited for that familiar voice that I use to love come through the phone.

Liam was napping lightly beside me his head snuggled into my chest and my free hand intertwined in his.  

I’m still completely confused out of my mind when it comes to this unborn child. Like fuck do I need a child for? If anything it’ll even more complicate my life.

Once I found out I was pregnant immediately I called my doctor and he told me that they’ll just watch it and to come in regularly like I was before. I don’t even know if this baby will still be in my stomach by my next treatment to be quite honest.

“Hello?”

My body went stiff and I couldn’t breathe anymore. It had been a good while since I’ve seen let alone heard from Chris. I’m surprised he even picked up the phone.

“Hey.” I said trying to keep my composure.

“What do you want?”

Rude ass.

“Uh—okay there’s something you need to know.”

“Don’t waste my time, I got shit to do. Fuck you want?” His voice was cold and militant. I don’t know what his problem is, I mean we haven’t spoken in months so whatever it is possibly couldn’t have been because of me.

“I’m pregnant.”

The other end was quiet for a second and I swear I heard him mumble some slick shit but I just waited for him to speak.

“And you’re telling me this because?”

I rolled my eyes and switched the phone over to my other ear. I should’ve known he would have acted like this.

“I think it’s yours why else would I be telling you!?”

Below Liam fidgeted a little and I decided to lower my voice so I don’t wake him up

“How I know it aint that other nigga’s?”

“How the fuck am I supposed to know? I found out not too long ago. It can be yours or his..”

“Look, I’m busy right now can we talk about this later?”

“When?”

“Fuck I don’t know…tomorrow around noon?”

“Fine.” I dragged.

“Aight see ya.”

“Bye.”

Even though we said goodbye I kept the phone to my ear and waited for him to hang up first. The conversation didn’t necessarily go how I planned it but I’m glad I still got to hear his voice.

After waiting for about five seconds I was about to hang up the phone when I heard Chris’s voice loud and clear.

“You ready?”

Who was he talking to?

“Yeah, let me grab my purse.” A female voice said. Her voice was faint and low and I could barely catch what was said but I swear it sounded like Eva.

“Hurry the fuck up! You know how Xylo is…”

Xylo?

“Calm down nigga! By the way who were you on the phone with?”

Shit that was Eva! What is she doing with Chris?

“Serenity! She say she pregnant or some shit…I don’t really care though cause it may not even be mine.”

“I knew she was a hoe.”

No the fuck she didn’t. Damn this is the second female that I called friend that then went behind my back and did/said some crazy shit.

I rolled my eyes and hung up the phone. I really need to reevaluate who I let into my life because lately I’ve been making some really bad decisions.

Fuck Eva, and fuck Chris. After tomorrow I want nothing to do with him. If he’s the dad he can be in the kids lide id not then I don’t ever want to see him again..That’s iff I even decide to have the baby.

I slid from underneath Liam and walked over to my vanity mirror before brushing what was left of my hair.

A few days ago, I went to the salon and got a cute Rihanna cut that fit my face perfectly.

Right now I wasn’t going to focus on my situation with Chris or this baby I just needed to focus on tonight. Liam’s twentieth birthday was today and we already had an amazing time this morning which explains why he was knocked out on top of me. Tonight was just going to be the icing on the cake.

To be honest I slightly forgot his birthday was today so when he left for classes yesterday I made a quick errand to Victoria Secret and picked up some sexy lingerie that I know he’ll love. What he’s getting tonight definitely  beats any other birthday gift he got today.

I looked down onto my dresser and dug through the draw for my lipstick then pulled out my hello kitty makeup bag before taking out my concealer and applying it to the dark circles beneath my eyes.

Now that I think about it as I apply this make up to my face, I can’t help but wonder what does Liam really see in me anymore? I’ve lost more than my looks in these past months.

My personality is bullshit now, I’m constantly on a roller coaster of emotions and this was before I was pregnant so I know he’s probably close to fed up.

Oh what am I thinking. I dismiss my thoughts and marvel at the promise ring Liam gave me a while ago in the mirror as I applied a cool shade of red lipstick to my lips.

Now that my makeup is done, all I needed to do was get dressed.

I got up from the mirror and walked over to my closet before pulling out a cute fall outfit and throwing it on my body.

I wasn’t really in the mood to be super dressy but I think the heels played it up a bit.

“Babe..” I was little startled by Liam’s voice but I smiled at how cute he looked after just waking up.

“Get up honey bun or else we’re gonna be late.” I said before walking over to the bed and planting a sloppily kiss on his cheek.

He scrunched his nose and rubbed the lipstick mark off that I left on his face and I laughed then put another one on his face except this time on his lips.

“Don’t ever call me that shit again.” He said as we parted.

“Whatever you say sweetie.”I said before smaking his butt as he got off the bed.

“Chillllllllll” he groaned as he walked over to the mini fridge and pulled out a coke.

He hated when I did that. He said I was violating his manliness or some stupid shit, I wasn’t really listening.

“Noo, don’t get hyped up on soda we’re about to go eat.” I said as I pulled the can out of his hand and placed it on top of the fridge.

He rolled his eyes dramatically and cracked a small smile.

“Okay MOM.”

I laughed then kissed him one last time before picking his jacket off of the sofa and leading him out of the dorm.

“Let’s go we’re gonna be late!”

I locked my room door and we walked hand in hand out to his car laughing and talking about nothing.

I loved being around Liam, he made everything okay so effortlessly and all of my problems seemed to melt away.

Tonight was going to be the most memorable birthday of his life and I’d do anything to be sure of that.

After a short walk from the main building to the parking lot we were at his car and I was already in the passenger seat as he started the ignition.

“…TURN ON THE LIGHTS… I’m lookin’ for ‘er too I heard she keep her promises and never turn on you, I heard she ain’t gone cheat and she gon never make no move…”

Future’s ugly ass voice came booming through the speakers as we pulled out of the parking lot and onto the street.

“This my shit.” Liam started bobbing his head to the music and I rolled my eyes hella hard.

I hate this fucking song, it’s stupid as hell and his voice is annoying as fuck.

“Uh how about…no..” I reached up to the radio and clicked the number “3” which switched the radio to a pop station.

“I’d trade my soul for a wish, Pennies and dimes for a kiss, I wasn’t looking for this,
But now you’re in my way….”

Carly Rae’s Call Me Maybe blasted and now it was my turn to bop my head back in forth. Honestly, I hated this song but it was just so fucking catchy that I couldn’t help but love it.

“Serenity turn this shit off.” He reached over to click the stations but I swatted his hand away.

“You know you love it.”

He groaned loudly then put his hand back on the wheel.

“Your stare was holdin’,Ripped jeans, skin was showin’,Hot night, wind was blowin’…..”
“Serenity for the love of god turn it off!!!!”

I was singing completely off key and bouncing in my seat while swinging my head around like a crazy woman.

“Here comes my favorite part!!”

“Where you think you’re going, baby? Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here’s my number,So call me, maybe?”

I sang right in Liam’s ear and he just tried pushing me off but I kept singing. The annoyed look that was on his face was so cute. I loved messing with him.

“Serenity pleaaseee.” He pleaded this time. I liked it when he begged, it made me feel like I was in control and what girl doesn’t like feeling that way?

“Fine.” I laughed before pushing the number “5” button on the radio.

“Sugar, sugar, sugar, Then I kissed your lips and you…. Turned…. on my fiiiirirreeeeeeee babbbeyyyyyyyy!”

“Aww shittttttt….” Liam and I said at the same time. I loved this fucking song it was one of my favorite oldies. Teena and Rick did this and I loved every bit of it.

We both laughed and I slid my hand into his while letting the music set a comfortable mood between us.

Chris

“No fucking more…I can’t do it.”

“Bro come the fuck on…we just need 500 bucks..dont act like you aint fuck random niggas before cause I know you have.” I said harshly to Eva over the music.

She raised her hand to slap me but I caught it and pulled her close into me.

“Lay a hand on me if you want to, I swear I’ll choke the shit out of you.” My voice was cold as ice and it seems like when I act like this it’s the only way to get a bitch to listen.

“Whatever, fuck off me.” She pushed me away then brushed off her skimpy school girl outfit before emerging into one of the private rooms.

It was a little over half past midnight and we were supposed to meet Xylo by 1:30 at some random warehouse.

We’d been in Fallen Angels since ten and only made roughly 1,500. Eva just wasn’t on her game tonight. It shouldn’t take three rounds of going on the pole and letting five niggas run through you to make 2 mother fucking grand.

Bitch needed to step her cookies up.

It wasn’t long before I could hear loud moans and knocking sounds come from the private room and a man’s voice grunt loudly.

I tapped my foot impatiently and ten minutes later Eva came out with her hair a mess and her skirt torn up the side.

“I never thought I’d say this but damn he was good.”

Told ya she was a hoe.

“Whatever, gimme the fucking money.”

She raised her hands up and placed the wad of cash into my hand and I turned on my heel before exiting the club.

“Chris wait!”

Eva was yelping like a damn Chihuahua and I just wanted to glue her mouth shut. I hadn’t had any drugs in my system in the past four or five hours and I was on fucking edge.

My main focus right now was to get the money to Xylo and get the drugs before went completely left.

Eva and I hopped in my car and sped down i-45 doing almost 100.

“Slow down nigga!”

“You wanna drive? Then here.”

I let go of the wheel looked over at her in the passenger seat. Her eyes were wide and she opened her mouth to say something but I shushed her then put my hands back on the wheel.

“You crazy or some shit?”
“Man shut the fuck up and get in the back seat you’re annoying the hell out of me.”

She rolled her eyes and like the obedient little Chihuahua that she is, she got up from the front seat and climbed in the back.

Finally some fucking peace and quiet.

I drove quickly, keeping my eyes peeled for cops and hidden police cars. It was already 1:15 and we had a while to go.

I didn’t need no cop stopping me and most of all giving me a ticket.

Right when the digital clock on my dash board struck 1:30 did we pull into the ware house parking lot.

“Let’s go.”

I put the money in my pants pocket then locked the car doors behind us. My legs moved swiftly as  I jogged in the night air up to the top stair case with Eva not to far behind.

Once we arrived at the small office door with the number 475 out side of it, I knocked softly and said the secret word then rested against the door frame.

“Why you so tense?”

I didn’t look back at her rather just waited for the familiar sound of the lock clicking as one of the guards let us in.

Not even two seconds after I thought that did the door swing open and one of the buff security dudes stand in front of Eva and I.

“We need to see Xylo.”

The dude nodded then put his hand behind his back before pulling out his gun and pointing it at Eva and I.

“It’s cool man, we’re one of youuuuu..” Eva’s voice filled the empty silence and this time I looked over at her.

Her mouth was in this crooked grin and her eyes told me everything I needed to know.

“Fuck you high for?!Shit I thought I told your ass to stay sober. You know better than me that Xylo hate that shit. Fuck …. Look if you get your ass beat I aint helping you.” I said shrugging.

Whatever happened to her happened. I was just here to take care of business and hurry home to my new love. Being without it for even these past few hours worried me a little only because I didn’t realize how addicted I was.

I looked up to the security guard and he kept the gun pointed at us has he lead us to the back room.

“Don’t make any quick movements, don’t reach in your pockets or anything unless told to. Understand?”

I nodded then felt the steel gun hit me in the back as he nudged us inside the room.

Xylo was sitting in a huge chair stacks upon stacks upon stacks of money laid infront of him on the glass table.

Cigar smoke filled the room and so did the low hums of voices of the other people who were in there also.

No one really gave a fuck that we came into the room except for Xylo as his hard eyes looked up and down.

“You got my money?” he said before placing his cigar down.

“Yeah.” I said cooly.

Xylo sent a small head nod to the security guard who led us in and he left before before closing the door behind him.

“Fuck you still standing there for? Hand it over.”

I walked swiftly from the spot I was standing in and placed it on his desk before backing away to where Eva was standing.

From the corner of my eyes I could see her twirl her hair and snicker whenever it fell back into place.

What was she doing?

“Eva stop laughing.” I whispered to her.

This only made her laugh harder and louder.

I threw my hand over my face as Xylo’s eyes popped up from the money and landed on her.

“What’s so funny?”

She shook her head and tried muffling her laughs but she kept giggling hard as fuck.

I kept my eyes on my feet as I heard Xylo’s chair push out from the table and his shoes clack against the floor.

Oh shit, he was about to fuck her up I just know it. I told her hard headed ass to be sober when we came up here.

I don’t know why she acting brand new like she aint know Xylo’s policies on be high when we doing business.

Fuck, I just hope he don’t give it to her too bad cause I aint really trying to jump in and save her, only to get my ass beat twice as hard.

“I said what is so funny?”

By now all conversation had ceased throughout the room and all  eyes were on us.

I just kept my head low and shook my head back and forth at Eva’s stupidity. Niggas out here are ruthless and don’t give two fucks whether you were a female or not. You signed up to be in the game and in the game everybody is the same. The only people who are seen different are the drug lords of course but to them all they see is dollar signs when it comes to us. And if one of them thinks their cash flow is in jeopardy they will do whatever they have to get things in order.

“It-it’s just….” Eva couldn’t even finish her sentence before busting into huge hysterics. She even put her hand on Xylo to keep her self from falling.

The fire in his eyes intensified and I honestly felt bad for Eva.

“Bitch are you high…right in front of my fucking face?” He took her arm off him and twisted it backward before getting up in her face.

“Fuck off me, that hurts…” she tried pushing him off but it was no use so she did the unthinkable.

She punched that nigga square in his nose.

“So…Imma just bounce aight? Cool.” I said aloud not really caring whether they said I could leave or not.

I turned around on my heel then headed for the door but before I could open it some mexican dude with tattoos all over his body stood in front of the door abd blocked me from leaving.

I kissed my teeth before rolling my eyes and looking at a now bloody nosed Xylo. He didn’t even say two words before slapping the shit of Eva and throwing her to the ground.

“Bitch you don’t know who you fucking with.”

He kicked her in her stomach and she yelped in pain. Everyone watched as he continued to kick the shit out of her before picking her up by her hair and punching her in her mouth.

Fuck, he was getting her good. I really felt bad for her. I wanted to help but I wasn’t really about that life.

“Get the fuck up!” he shouted.

But all Eva did was cry in pain and wipe at the blood that was pouring from her mouth.

Xylo raised his hand to slap her again but stopped before sending a big wad of spit down onto her face.

Dammmnnnn, that’s some mad disrespectful shit right there… Oh well.

“Santino, get this bitch.” Xylo ordered before returning to his chair.

Who I assumed was “Santino” stood up from and walked over to a crying bloody Eva.

“You should really stay in your lane princess…this is grown man work.” Santino said evily before unbuckling his pants.

Aw fuck…

“And you really shouldn’t have worn this outfit either…when will you hoes learn?” he said before dropping his pants completely.

Everyone had already gone back to what they were doing not really taking interest in us anymore.

Damn I had to do something I cant just let this nigga rape Eva. I know she was wrong but fuck what if that was my sister or some shit? I may not have a sister but what if I did?

I swallowed hard and looked away as Eva called out for me to help her.

“Chriiss!! Please helppp mee.” He voice cracked and strained as she pleaded for help between her loud cries.

Shit shit shit…. What am I gonna do? Fuck it, Eva may have done some stupid shit but I wasn’t about to let this happen right in front of my face.

“Fuck off her!” I ran up “Santino” and pushed him off Eva while sending a quick blow to his head.

Eva quickly pulled on her clothes and ran for the door. Of course she didn’t make it out before some beefy nigga pulled her back and raised a gun to her temple.

It wasn’t long before I felt my self being pulled up from ontop of Santino and now being punched repeatedly. Blows were coming from every part of my body.

Some to my face, some to the back of my head and mainly in my chest. It had to be four or fice niggas on me and I was doing a pretty damn good job defending myself but it wasn’t enough. I felt a hard blow come to my rib cage and it made me yell in pain. I held my side as they continued to jump me.

Hot blood was flowing out of me as I coughed and trying to catch my breath. My sight was going in and out and I felt like I was about to die.

“STOP!”

Xylo’s voice pierced the room and I felt one last hit to the back of the head before I curled into a small ball in the middle of the floor.

I literally just got the shit beat out of me and I had zero fight left.

“Fuck up.”

I strained as I tried to pull myself up but fell back down my jaw connecting with the cold floor.

“I said get up nigga.”

Xylo’s strong hand was placed tightly on the collar of my neck as he yanked me up on my knees.

My head hung low as I spit small clumps of blood out ever so often.

This is what I get for stepping out of my lane. Who knew that fucking with Eva would end me up here…damn cocaine is a powerful drug and yet even in this moment I still didn’t want to give it up.

“Do you think this is a game son?”

Xylo placed the cool steel of the gun beneath my chin as he raised my head so we were looking each other in the eyes.

The light from the bulb above blasted him from behind and it made Xylo look like an angel but he was from that.

“No.” I choked out.

“No what?” He raised my chin higher so that the back of my head was just about touching my back and I winced in pain.

Fuck this nigga, I was not about to be his bitch and call him master.

“Go to hell.” I said suddenly getting bold.

Xylo laughed then smacked the gun across my cheek and laughed erupted throughout the room.

“NOO!” Eva screamed but it was no use.

“Shut that bitch up.”

I wasn’t sure what they did to her but soon after no sounds were coming from Eva’s end.

“Yo leave her alone…” I managed.

Xylo chucked then kneeled down beside me and placed the barrel of the gun deep into my temple.

“You one brave little nigga..You know I liked you…too bad I couldn’t have gotten to know you better, you would have been a great asset to the crew.”

I groaned in pain as I pulled my hand up and flipped him the bird before smiling a bloody smile.

If I’m going down might as well go all out.

Xylo shook his head and made a tsk noise before standing up and pointing the gun down at me.

His finger was tight on the trigger and the last thing I saw was Eva breaking loose and running towards me.

Serenity

“This place is dope!” I said as we entered the lounge. The place was amazing. Chic furniture occupied the empty spaces and a live jazz band played softly on the stage. Nicely dressed waiters and waitresses walked swiftly around the room delivering food and wine bottles to the different guests.  

“I know.” Was all liam could say because he was just as in awe as I was.

Now that I’ve seen the scenery I wished I would have dressed a little nicer. I shrugged my shoulders and walked up to the hostess stand with Liam right behind me.

“Chour namez?” A French guy with a curly mustache asked us as we arrived at the desk.

“Liam and Serenity.” Liam spoke. The French guy flipped through the book and licked his fingers as he looked down at the names.

“Ah, right tis way.”

The French guy made a quick mark on the paper then lead Liam and I to a small corner right by the live band.

“Chour waitair will be wif yew shortly.”

I nodded then smiled hard before stuffing a hot roll in my mouth and chewed loudly. I was eating too nasty but I was excited. The atmosphere was everything right now and I’m glad we made reservations for this place.

Liam and I chatted a bit before our waiter took our orders and returned not even twenty minutes later with our food. Liam had ordered some lobster dish and I got some foreign plate that I couldn’t pronounce. I may not have known what I was eating but damn was it good.

Liam and I ate up then had a small desert before kicking it on the dance floor.

Right now we were swaying back in forth, Liam’s hands low on my back and my arms wrapped around his neck.

“Today was amazing, thank you so much.” Liam said it to my ear.

I stood up on my tippy toes and kissed him softly never missing a beat in the music.

“No problem baby, I had a good time too.”

We danced a little more before the band played one last song. Even though the music had stopped Liam and I still swayed slightly in place just enjoying each other.

I was so comfortable standing there  in his strong arms and I never wanted to leave.

“Now, there’s a special little lady out there tonight with a good man by her side. Today is a young man’s birthday and he requested we play this song for them. I’d like everyone to evacuate the dance floor and let them dance this one solo.” A soft bass filled voice filled the room and  I looked up to see the lead guitarist looking over at us.

I smiled lightly then looked away before trying to pull Liam off of the floor.

“Where are you going?” he said before pulling me back.
“You heard him..he said we needed to leave….”

I looked up at him and he smiling down at me and I finally put two and two together.

“LIAM!” I rolled my eyes and slapped his chest.

I hated being in the spotlight and he fucking knows it. Now we have to dance in front of hundreds of strangers and I could feel myself getting sweaty.

“Just relax babe.” He said smoothly into my ear before pulling me in close. I closed my eyes and rest my head on his chest as the guitarist voice filled the room with soft lyrics and the band playing sweetly to accompany his voice.

“You know I love you right?” Liam said after a minute of silence.

I nodded against him and continued to sway with the music trying to block out the hundreds of eyes which I’m sure were on us right now.

“And you know you’re the only one for me..right?” he spoke into my hair.

“Mhmm.”

“Say it…”

“What?”

“That you love me..”

“I love you Liam.”

He smiled then hugged me tightly before kissing my neck and I felt my legs turn into noodles.

The music was near its end and I was growing a little sad. Even though I didn’t like everyone staring at us I never wanted this moment to end.

“Now, will the birthday boy come up here.”

Liam parted from me and I looked at him puzzled. He just smiled really hard before walking up to the stage and taking the mic.

A random waiter had run over to me and handed me one as well. All eyes were on Liam and I  and it was making me feel some type of way.

Liam looked up at me from the stage and smiled before placing it infront of his lips.

“Baby?”

“Yes?” I said into the mic.

“I just want you to know that I will forever love you and no other girl in this world will ever satisfy me like you do. Even if you stopped having sex with me, just our emotional connection alone would be enough. I mean…don’t stop having sex with me though.” He laughed. I laughed too and shook my head.

“You don’t have to worry about that…”

He nodded then opened his mouth to speak again.

“You’re my everything and I can’t picture my life without you. When I sleep at night I dream about you, when I’m awake I never want to be without you even to let you just go to pee makes me uneasy. I just want to spend every second with you. You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever laid my eyes on and I’ve never loved someone as much as I love you.”

“Liam please you’re making me blush.”

Everyone cooed and laughed lightly at us and I fidgeted a little in my spot. Liam was now walking off the staging and was closing the distance between us.

“I want to grow old and grey with you and have tons of grandkids. Promise me we’ll do it.”

I stared deep into his eyes and they were  hard yet soft. We both know that that isn’t going to happen but for the sake of him I promised and kept my eyes locked into his honey brown ones.

By now he was right in front of me and I could feel the heat in my cheeks rise. The way the dim lighting was bouncing off his skin made him look extraordinarily handsome and I was ready to just plant a thousand kisses all over his body.

“Now that you’ve promised to br my everything for all eternity. I have a question for you.” Hesaid slyly.

“Okaayyy..”

He reached his hand into his back pocket and pulled out a red velvet box. All through out the lounge I could hear people gasping including myself.

“Liam…w-what are you doing?”

Tears were crowded my eyes and I had to fan myself before wiping my face. My mind was racing and I couldn’t think clear, I swear I’m going to faint.

“Serenity LeAnn Baker?”

“Yes?” I choked.

This nigga better not do what I think he was about to.

Liam popped opened the velvet box and sure enough there was sparkingly diamond ring sitting pretty against the white pillow that held the ring.

He bent down on one knee and I lost it.

All throughout the lounge people were clapping and whooping loudly and I couldn’t control the tears that were streaming down my face.

“Liam…” I barely whispered.

Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit.

“Will you marry me?”

_________________________________

Well that’s the end of part 1 of Cloud Nine! Part two will be released shortly! I am unsure of when I will release part two but it will be announced soon! 

SO how was it? Leave ANY kinda comments you want in my ask box. Curse me out or whatever the fuck your little heart desires but regardless I want to hear from you! 

There will be a second part and only expect it to be between 5-10 chapters before the end :(

SO FEEDBACK HERE

Cloud Nine- Chapter 21 Part 3: Deathly Addictions

Chapter 21 Part 3

Serenity

“I don’t want to…you do it.”

“Bro stop fucking around..just look at it.”

“I-I can’t…”

Liam was standing up against the bathroom wall with his hands stuffed in his pockets and I was on top of the cold toilet seat with my knees to my chest and the test in my hand. It had been a good two weeks since the car ride from the airport when I put two and two together that I might be pregnant.

This whole time I refused to take a test because I was scared shitless of the results but finally Liam convinced me to do it and for the past thirty minutes we’ve been fighting over who should look at it first.  

I would have done it earlier if I knew it was a hundred percent Liam’s but because I’m not sure, what am I supposed to do if he gets all excited and shit?  I cant just crush his spirits like that.

My eyes drifted from Liam’s tired expression to the test down in my hand.

Slowly I turned it around and held my breath.

Shit.

A small pink plus sign was on the stick and before I could formulate any words Liam had snatched it from my hands.

“Whoa…”

I sighed then got up from the toilet and stormed out of the bathroom then ran across the hall to my bedroom.

“Where you going?” Liam called after me.

I just stomped down the hall and slammed the door behind me before falling to the floor.

Everything is going so wrong. Nineteen and pregnant… not exactly how I imagined my life.

To be honest I would of liked to be married before having my first kid so I just don’t know what I’m going to do with this one.

I rubbed my slightly poked out tummy and bit my lip so I wouldn’t cry.

Liam was banging on my door and yelling for me to let him in but  I just sat there and thought about the possibilities for this future child.

It is going to go through so much, not having a mother being the main one. Even though I had a mother it was like she didn’t even exist because of the shit she put me through and I don’t my child to feel how I felt.

Before I never really understood or cared for abortions but right now that was looking like an option.

 “Let me in!” Liam yelled one more time.

Fed up, I stood to my feet and opened the door before yanking him inside and shutting it behind him.

I was going through enough stress as it is I don’t need anymore on top of that so I guess I better spill the beans about him not being the father.

At least the possibility of Chris being the father wasn’t from me cheating but rather just me being stupid and reckless.

“Liam you may not be the dad.” I blurted before he said anything else. No need to talk a lot of bullshit, I just needed to cut to the chase and tell him.

“What??”

“Plus, I was thinking about having an abortion. I mean we’re both so young and with my condition…having a child right now just doesn’t seem like a good idea!”

“Serenity the fuck are you saying right now? Do you hear yourself? You sound stupid as hell and fuck you mean I may not be the dad?”

Liam’s once calm voice was now raised and strained.

I groaned then averted my eyes away from his and looked down at my feet.

“Chris may be the dad, and before you get mad and look like a dumb ass it’s not because I cheated..”

Liam just crossed his arms over his chest and leaned up against the door keeping his eyes hard on me. His thin pink lips were creased in a straight line and hurt was slowly intertwining with the pissed expression that was still on his face.

“Remember when you gave me that promise ring that night…well a couple of days before we hooked up, Chris and I had sex and well he didn’t wear a condom..and you know I’m not on birth control so… I don’t know whose it is.. I’m sorry Liam.”

My eyes stayed locked on my feet the entire time I spoke because I didn’t want to see the look of disappointment I know he was wearing right now.

Even though I wasn’t looking at Liam, I cringed a little when I heard him inhale to speak because I’m sure he was about to yell at me.

But then again he has no fucking right to say shit because he fucked me without protection too so anything he is about to say is irrelevant.

I kept looking down and braced myself for whatever he was about to say but he never said anything.

Instead he stepped close to me and wrapped his strong arms around me. My head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck and that is when I started to cry.

Why is he being such a good boyfriend? Fuck, I was hoping he did some stupid shit so I could be mad at him and have a even more reason to get rid of this thing that was growing inside of me but all he did was make me want to have the baby and live happily ever after with him.

Fuck, I wish he wasn’t such a good man to me sometimes…he doesn’t deserve me. Real shit. I’m always rude and bossy towards him but he just takes it and loves me for the psycho bitch that I am.

He kissed the top of my head and massaged my back with his hand.

“I don’t care whose baby it is because no matter what I’ll be here for you..through everything and don’t you ever think about taking that precious baby away from me. Even if you don’t want it, I do and just the thought of it possibly being mine is enough for me to love it with all of my heart. Promise you’ll keep it..” His lips brushed against my ear with every word he spoke and it sent chills down my spine.  

“Okay.” I lied.

I’m not ready to be a mother and as a woman it’s my choice to decide when and how I will become one. Even though time isn’t on my side, I rather put this off for another time and place.
A baby right now is just not what I want or need but to please Liam I consoled him with little comments of assurance that the baby was here to stay and for right now it was.

Liam’s other hand that was once stationed on my waist glided softly to my stomach and he pressed against it while smiling down at me.

“Stop doing that.” I demanded as I swatted away another tear.

“Doing what?” he asked with a smile still on his face. His hand was moving in small circles now which made my tears fall even faster.

I was so over whelmed with emotions that I was speechless.

“Ooh, I wonder if it has a heartbeat yet!!” Liam said excitedly while dropping down to his knees and lifting my shirt up.

See this is the shit I was talking about. He was already too attached to it and it was making me feel some type of way that I can’t explain.

Liam continued to lift my shirt up until all of my stomach was exposed and then placed his cool ear against my tummy and let the shirt fall on his head. His hands pushed against the smalls of my back as he tried harder to listen for a beat which I’m sure wasn’t there yet.

“I love you Serenity and I can’t wait to be a family.”

He kissed my stomach a few times before snuggling his head into me. I just stood there still speechless and eventually petted the back of his head.

“I love you too.” I spoke finally.

His mouth curled into a small smile against me and he kissed my thigh quickly while still holding onto the lower half of my body.

He was such a love sap I swear.  

Fuck am I gonna do? I just hope Chris takes this just as good as Liam did but knowing him, he probably won’t.

Chris

When Eva and I left VA, I was definitely not the same nigga that went in.

“Here.” She spoke softly.

Her small hands guided the substance over to me and  I chopped it up with a razor blade before sliding it all onto a creased dollar bill.

“Fuck..”

Some of the coke had slipped off the dollar and scatter onto the floor. Eva glared at me, her eyes red in anger and I just shot her the middle finger before placing the dollar bill back onto the table.

She huffed and rolled her eyes before snatching out her cell phone and typing a quick message which I’m sure was to our dealer.

Ever since I snorted my first line at that party on Thanksgiving, my life had changed completely even though it’s only been a few weeks. Despite what Eva told me the desire to get high never went away. A week being sober turned into a few days turned into a few hours then turned into a few minutes.

My nose itched for the burning sensation I got every time I snorted and the feeling it gave me was amazing.

At least she didn’t lie about that.

Together, we’ve been getting high and just doing what the fuck we wanted to do. Occasionally we’d fuck but our relationship doesn’t really have any sustenance to it. I still fuck other girls and sometimes right in front of her.

Disrespectful? Maybe but I told her before we started this “relationship” if that’s what you wanna call it, that there are no strings attached and I meant that shit.

Now and days we’ve been intimate more frequently only because when I’m in paradise, as I call it, I’m not in control of what I do or how I act. I just let the drug possess me and take every inch of my being before I have to  check back into reality.

Oddly, Eva confessed to me a few days ago that she’d been doing coke for the past couple of months. She claims it helps her get through the nights she has to dance and all that other shit.

I just don’t know how I never noticed it until now.

She was really good at hiding it but as for me…not so much.

My youthful appearance was slowly changing and I hate to admit it but I looked like shit. I let all of my hair grow out and didn’t really care to much to shave. The skin around my nose was always pink because of my constant scratching and rubbing of it.  Occasionally, I’d have random nose bleeds and all of this other bullshit so I just decided to stay out the public eye and stay in my dorm chillin.

The classes I were taking right now were easy as fuck and I had an option of doing the work online so everything worked out.

I could stay home, get high, fuck Eva and eat anything I wanted…could it get any better than that?

Right now I rubbed my nose slightly and rested my head on the couch cushion as my body buzzed in response to the drug. 

“You feel it yet?” Eva asked.

I looked over at her and she was making that same orgasmic facial expression she made every time we’d do this.

“Hell yeah.”

I licked my lips then pulled her over into my lap and planted small kisses around her neck.

She started to rotate her hips on top of me and I groaned a little at the way she was making me feel.

“Wait hold on..” she said breaking our embrace.

I sucked my teeth then pulled her back into me and tried finishing what I started.

“Chris stop, look!”

She shoved her beat up iPhone into my face and on the screen read Xylo with a accept or decline button beneath his name.

My body tensed a little beneath her and she gave me “that’s what I thought” look before placing the phone to her ear.

Xylo [zy-lo] was our dealer and boss. When we got back to Cali, we wasted no time getting our hands on our most prized possession but everything comes with a cost. Xylo didn’t look like a dealer, he was well kept, had a regular physique and  a smooth voice. He just looked like an average nigga. Until you pissed him off.

I personally have never experienced him when he goes ape shit but from what Eva told me, it’d be best to keep it that way.

“Hello?” Eva said into the phone as she climbed from off of me.

“Yes everything’s going fine…we made a lot of money this week.” She said in a polite voice.

I could tell she was struggling to keep her composure and not reveal the state of mind she was in now but the way her eyes wandered around the room and her hand did that little twitch thing that it does, it was easy to tell that she was out of it.

“Okay, tonight is fine…See you there. Bye.”

She took the phone down from her ear then stuffed it back into her pockets before looking over at me.

“We are in some deep shit.”

I raised an eyebrow at her then stood up off the floor.

“Why?”

She smacked her lips then started pacing back and forth.

“I just lied to him! You know we aint made shit, yet all the merch is gone..FUCK!” she said her hands trembling.

Every now and then Eva and I dipped into what we were supposed to be selling and we ended up snorting all of the goods.

“Calm the fuck down, we can get the money easy. How much we owe him?” I said cooly.

“2 grand…”

Well shit.

I groaned loudly then started to pace along side her.

How are we going to make two grand in five hours? My hands stroked my chin as I thought when quickly a light went off in my head.

Deviously, I stared up at Eva and it didn’t take long for her to notice me.

“Fuck you staring at me for?” she said sassily.

“I got an idea.” I said darkly.

She poked her hips out and put her hands up waiting for me to say whatever it was I was about to say.

She is going to hate what I’m about to say but fuck, desperate times call for desperate measures.

“Dance at Fallen Angels tonight.. You might want to do a few private sessions also.” I said while thrusting my hips twice on the last part.

Her face stayed expressionless as she took in what I just said.

“What do you take me for? I aint a hoe…” she shouted.

“Fuck you trynna prove? I know you aint a “hoe” so why does it matter. Just take like four or five clients and we can bounce.”

“Hell to the naw. I don’t do that shit. Dancing is one thing, but fucking for money is a whole different story. I-I have morals you know..”

I chuckled lightly when she said that and snorted a few times.

Morals? Yeah right.

“Asshole.” She spat before turning away from me.

I laughed a little more before placing my hand on her shoulder and turned her around.

“What else can we do? You know Xylo and I aint trynna get my ass kicked you feel me? Just do a few lines and forget about it.”

“That’s exactly what got us in this mess! You know whaatttt….” She breathed deeply and closed her eyes. “I’ll do it but this is the ONLY time, after this no more dipping into the stash cause I aint got time for Xylo’s craziness.”

I kissed my teeth because I knew this wasn’t going to be the last time she did this. We both loved the drug too much to really give any fucks about how we got it.

My heart danced in excitement just thinking about later on tonight when we got our hands on some more merch but for now I was going to have to stay sober for the next five or so hours.

Fuck, that was going to be hard to do but I’ll try my best.

Again, I snaked my arms around Eva’s waist and pulled her into me before looking down and kissing her. 

Easily, she jumped up into my arms and wrapped her legs around me while slithering her tongue deep into my mouth. 

I carried her over to the couch and wasted no time taking her clothes off. 

“You love me?” she asked in between kisses.

it took all  I had in me to not laugh at her.

“Y-yea…” I said quickly before sliding myself into her.

“Okay goo—”

I cut her off by slamming deep inside of her and kissing her sloppily on the lips. She really needed to learn to stop talking so damn much and just enjoy this shit. I knew the whole no  strings attached thing wasnt going to work out but fuck it my high was wearing off and I might as well make the most of it. 

_______________________________________

For the record, despite what you all read in this chapter I am pro-life.

Cloud Nine- Chapter 21 Part 2: Ecstasy

There are 3 parts to 21

_____________________

Chapter 21 Part 2

Serenity

“Thank you for having me in your home today. The food is delicious.” My mom said to Felicia. Felicia put a small smile on her lips but never missed a beat in lifting her sterling silver fork to her mouth and downing pieces of turkey.

“So how is college life?”

The room was silent and it didn’t register that she had directed her question towards me until several seconds later.

“It’s whatever.”

“That’s nice honey.”

My eyes rolled around beneath my lids as I returned to pushing macaroni remains around on my plastic plate.

“Anything going on in your life?”

Involuntarily, I sighed heavily signaling my annoyance with her small talk and pushed my seat up from under me before walking up to the black stove and slopping more food on my plate.

“Somebody’s moody.” I heard her say in the distance. Bitch was acting like everything was okay and we both know good and damn well it wasn’t.

“Everything’s great Ms. Baker.” Liam said trying to save the conversation.

“Oh, I’m no longer a Baker just call me Christy.” She smiled big as fuck at Liam and it was pissing me off.

“Sorry about that.” Liam apologized.

“No problem hunny, so anything new you’d like to share with me?”

NO BITCH, we don’t want to share shit with you. Take your prying ass out of our lives please.

“Naw not much has been going on. I mean it’s been pretty busy lately from studying my major and Serenity’s treatments, it has been a lot on our plate for these past few months.

What the fuck Liam? I know I specifically told his big mouth ass not to say shit about my illness. I swear this nigga can never keep a damn secret.

“Liam!” I screeched before placing my plate down on the counter.

At the sound of my voice, I watched as his head snapped up with that dumbfounded ass expression he always wore whenever I got upset.

“What I do?” He asked totally unaware of the beans he just spilled.

“What treatments is he talking about?” My dad asked as he slowly put his fork down onto his plate and stared at me with a stern look in his eyes.

“Oh…” Liam said before excusing himself.

Why the fuck he running away, he got me into this there was no way he was leaving me here alone to face them.

As he threw his plate away in the trash can I tugged on the end of his grey sweater and dug my nails deep into his skin causing him to wince in pain.

“You’re not leaving me.” I said softly before turning around to face my family.

Around the room I could see my family’s faces twist and turn into confusion.

Everyone’s eyes were glued to me, waiting for me to straighten shit out but I’m just not in a place where I’m ready to talk about this shit.

I could feel my bottom lip slowly curl back into my mouth in between my teeth as I bit down on it trying to keep from saying anything that would put me in a even deeper hole.

Fuck it, I can’t lie to them, they’d know sooner or later. I just preferred later.

“I have leukemia.” I said flatly.

Not surprisingly, everyone’s mouth’s flew open and dishes clinked against each other as forks and knives were dropped.

My hand flew up to my face and I let out a big breath of air. The way they were all staring at me like I was some helpless little girl was starting to irritate me. I didn’t need their mother fucking pity, I am happy with my life just how it is even though it took me a while to come to feel this way, I wasn’t about to let everyone try and revert me back to my old ways of thinking.

“Now don’t start throwing me a pity party, ‘cause frankly I don’t need nor want it.”

“How did this happen? Aww baby this is so sad!” My mom asked like she really gave a fuck.

My eyes quickly switched over to Liam who was leaning against the counter and sending me an apologetic look.

“Fuck am I supposed to know? And don’t front just cause we got fam over like you really even give two shits about me.” My words were laced with annoyance and rage and quite frankly I could care less. These people never cared about me before so why they want to front like they do know?

I aint about that fake stuff so they can miss me with their bullshit.

 “Excuse me.” Felicia said sassily.

“Nothing.” I spat then placed a hand on my hip.

“Your hostility isn’t needed Serenity. We’re just concerned about you.”

“Blah blah blah, yeah right.” I scoffed.

“What is your problem?” my mom asked

I laughed lightly then shifted my weight onto my other leg and pulled my hair behind my ear.

“You’re kidding right? What is my problem? What is my problem? Hmm well let’s see. You ignored me pretty much all my life and before now didn’t give a rat’s ass what happened to me. Oh and not to mention that incident with the ice skating rink.. Everyone thought I was fucking crazy and blamed me for all the chaos. No I am not playing the victim role but the fact that you took that man’s side over ME was complete bullshit. Yeah, it’s been over 10 years so fucking what. I’m still pissed as hell and I don’t want shit to do with you!” I could feel my hands clench tightly as anger pumped vigorously throughout my veins.

Just looking at this buck tooth bitch I once called mom upset me. I hate to speak bad about her but fuck it she deserves it.

 “Watch your language! There are kids in the room!” She countered. Of course she had nothing to say because she know everything I said was the truth.

“So…”

 I was giving them such a hard time but I didn’t give a fuck.

 “Serenity LeAnn Baker, living room this instant.”  I rolled my eyes and completely ignored her and instead picked my plate up and proceeded to find some tupperware. I refuse to be in this house for another minute.

After placing the food into two containers, I ran up the stairs and started packing my shit

“Well that escalated quickly.” Liam said as he watched me throw my things into the huge suit case.

“Yeah, and it’s all your fault. Now stop standing there and fucking help me.”

Liam pushed himself off the wall and knelt down beside me folding his shirts one by one.

Is this nigga serious?

“Boy gimme that shit.” I said snatching it out of his hands and throwing it into the suit case. Within a short ten minutes all our shit was out of the guest bedroom and we were ready to roll.

Even though our plane didn’t take off until sometimes tomorrow night, were leaving Seattle immediately, regardless of the cost of a last minute flight ticket.

“Where are you guys going?”Felicia asked as she watched me clank down the stairs, suit cases in hand.

“We’re out, it’s obvious this wasn’t a good idea. See yall whenever.”

Not listening or caring about what anyone else had to say, my hands quickly undid the door lock and I walked out not looking back.

Chris

“Momma J this was an awesome dinner, I had a great time.”

Eva and I were sitting in the dining room with my momma and “Alonso”, enjoying a fine meal. Surprisingly, Alonso wasn’t that bad and I actually liked him. I could tell he made momma happy and that’s all that matters.

“Thank ya suga, now tell me does Chris here put it down in the bed room?”

“MOMMMA!”

Eva laughed lightly, and I nearly choked on my food.

I can’t believe she just fucking asked that. All damn day since me and Eva got here she been asking all these personal questions about our relationship but each time my answer is the same.

 “Momma please, not today. I told you we are just friends!”

“Whatever boy, I be seeing the glances yall make at each other. I’m not stupid.” She said while shrugging her shoulders.

One momma said that my eyes trailed slowly from Eva’s face down to her breast which were sitting perfectly in her outfit. Then they made their way down trailing the outlines of her waist before being cut off by the wooden table.

Eva was looking mighty fine today, she had on this sexy black dress which showed off all her assets and I just couldn’t keep my eyes away from her. At first I thought what she had on was a bit racy for dinner but when Momma first saw her, she complimented her on her outfit so everything was cool.

“Yeah like Chris said, we’re just friends.” Even though Eva was talking to momma her eyes were glued on mine and I swear I saw her wink at me. Lately, she’s been a little flirty but shit I wasn’t complaining. TO be honest, I was playing along flirting right back, constantly tell her how fine she is but I obviously only got one thing in mind.

I know Eva and I are friends but hanging around a bitch as fine as her can get hard at times. I’m not a dumbass I know she likes me but right now I’m just getting in good so when the day finally comes when I beat her pussy out the frame, there won’t be any complications.

After a few seconds of eye contact with Eva, I tore away and looked down at my empty plate.

“Well I’m full, let me go do the dishes right quick.” I offered while picking up everyone’s plates and silverware.

“Whhhatt?? Chris doing the dishes, this is a first!” Momma said jokingly.

I just shook my head and kissed her on her cheek before taking everything into the kitchen and loading it up in the dishwasher.

After about fifteen minutes, I was finished washing dishes and cleaning the kitchen, so I made my way into the living room. Once I got there, only Eva was sitting on the couch with the T.V. on and her feet kicked up.

“Where my momma go?” I asked.

“Oh her and Alonso went out…”
The fuck? How she just gone leave without telling me?

I shook my head before plopping down next to Eva. As I fell back into the couch it made everything shake including Eva’s ass. I didn’t realize it but my eyes never left her rear,

Got damn, she was thick as fuck and it made me wonder how she’d feel if she was riding on top of me.

“Chris hello!?! I’m asked you a question!!” Eva shouted while snapping her fingers.

My eyes blinked a few times before I closed my mouth a gulped hard. Bitch had me fantasizing and shit, I wasn’t down for all of that. If anything it should be the other way around.

“W-what?”

“I said, you wanna go to a party??”

“Hell yeah, how you know about a party?”

“I told you VA is my hometown, and I know plenty of people here. My homegirl just texted me a few seconds ago. She said there’s this huge ass party going down right now.”

“Then fuck we still doing here?” I asked while laughing.

A playful smile crossed her face as she took her feet off the couch and slid them deep into her heels.

“Yo, I hope you’re ready cause shit gets crazy out here.” Eva and I were already out in front of the house and climbing into my car.

“Man whatever, this shit is probably gone be wack as fuck. You aint been to a real party until you been with me and my boys. Shit gets wild.”

“Mhmm, but uhm, we might have to hail a cab and stay in a motel or some shit because it’d be best if we didn’t go back home to Momma fucked up.”

Damnn, she already trying to get my dick trying to get me in a motel and stuff.

“Aight that’s cool. But all I know is, I better not catch no niggas all up on you or we’re gonna have a problem.”

Her eyes squinted slightly and her lips pouted out into a “boy please” type of way.

“I’m serious Eva don’t make me say it again.”

Her mouth opened wide as echoes of laughter filled the car.

“Gone on, you aint my man.”

I rolled my eyes and placed my hand on her thigh. Her skin was hot but soft and I could feel the goose bumps start to form as my hand rose higher and higher up her thigh.

I could hear her breath catch as my hand slid up her dress and massaged deep in her inner thigh almost coming in contact with the lips of her vagina which was covered by a thin piece of cloth.

I honestly, wasn’t trying to start anything just wanted her shut the fuck up and listen to me and what do you know… it worked.

My hand slid from underneath her dress and she sucked her teeth before crossing her arms across her chest.

This time it was my turn to laugh and I did just that before blasting the radio and pressing my foot down on the gas.

***

Eva wasn’t lying when she said shit was gonna be crazy. All night, random bitches rotated their asses against my dick and were hanging off of me non stop. A haze of smoke constantly filled the room as blunts were passed, and bongs were hit. Music pumped loudly throughout the house and I was wide as fuck.

Unfortunately, I hadn’t seen Eva all night, it seems like she disappeared as soon as we got here. But I wasn’t tripping though, while dancing on the floor and just roaming around the house I ran into a lot of people I use to be friends with or go to school with before leaving for college in Cali.

It wasn’t until I was making my way to the restroom when I spotted Eva’s sexy silhouette stuffed slightly behind a half opened door with a few other people.

Being the nosy mother fucker that I am, I quickly two stepped through the mix of sweaty bodies and watched curiously at what was happening in the secluded area.

“Shit, this is good.” A unfamiliar voice said and was then followed up by a weird noise.

 Fuck are they doing?

Sneakily, I inched closer but was betrayed by the creaky old floors.

“Aye nigga, get the fuck outta here before I fuck yo shit up.” Some muscle headed white dude said.

I couldn’t help but laugh at him. If this nigga think that even for a second he would lay a finger on me he got another thing coming.

“Bro chill, he’s with me.” From the shadows, Eva emerged, her eyes red and wandering.

“What the fuck have you been doing?”

She looked like a mad woman. Her pupils were huge as fuck and the whites of her eye balls were shot ruby red. I could see her hand twitch slightly by her side as her left foot tapped impatiently.

“Keep your voice down…and I’m just having fun.” She said but her voice wasn’t the same.

My eyebrow raised slightly as I watched her closely. Bitch was definitely on something but I just couldn’t put my finger on what.

“Look, are we done talking or what? Cause I gotta get back.” She said her mood changing completely in a split second.

Annoyance stained her face and impatience was evident in her body language.

“I-I was just checking on you.”

She rolled her eyes then clasped her small hands around my wrist.

“Come on, shit’s lame out there and we haven’t had our fun yet.” Again with the mood change.

At this moment I was completely speechless and just went along with whatever she said.

She pulled me into the room that she came from and shut the door completely behind us before guiding me to a mini circle of people that was formed in the middle of the room.

“Yall this is Chris.”

The people didn’t respond rather just waved me off and continued what they were doing. Even though I was up close, I still was clueless of what they were doing.

Eva sat me down in the circle and wasn’t until then did I realize what was going on.

“Take this shit.” Some brunette haired girl said before passing me a small square of glass.

On top of the glass was a line of white powder and it didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what it was.

“Eva fuck you doing with this shit?” I whispered and nudged her.

“I don’t see the problem?” she said nonchalantly.

“I don’t fuck with this shit y—“

“Shut the fuck up and stop being such a pussy. Damn.” I felt the smooth piece of glass slip between my fingers and into Eva’s as she pulled it away from me.

In one motion, she flipped her long hair back and placed a manicured finger on one side of her nose before snorting one line of the white powder.

“Ahh” Her head flew back and she wiped at her nose before placing the glass down on the ground.

“Gosh that was good.”

I can’t believe this bitch is snorting cocaine yo. I knew she was into some crazy shit but fuck she doing snorting coke?

I shook my head then stood up to leave.

“Chris no! You can’t go.” She said while yanking me back down on the ground.

By now, the people who ignored my presence when I entered were now staring at me with wide eyes as they slowly came back to reality falling from their high.

“I’m not doing this, you crazy as hell.” I spat.

Fuck I look like snorting coke. Bitch had me fucked up.

“Chris…just listen to me…” she could barely speak more than four or five words without taking a short pause and breathing releasing her head backward taking in the drug. Her head was back straight and she was looking me in my eyes.

“Just try it. I promise it’d be good. Plus it’s only once…. Nobody said you had to…..do it a lot…just stop whenever you had enough….trust me I’m right here.”

Eva’s eyes were fluttering a bit and light moans slipped between her lips.

She looked like she was having a orgasm and oddly it was turning me on. She bit deep into her lip and I watched as the drug over took her mind.  After what seemed like forever, she finally opened her eyes and stared at me with a slight smirk.

“Well?” she asked.

“I don’t Eva….”

She placed her hand on my thigh and gave it a tight squeeze before looking me in the eye again, speaking in broken sentences.

“You’ll love it….It takes you to a place you’ll never want to leave…just try it…” she reached beside her and picked up the square piece of glass and raised it to my face.

I looked at her and she smiled sweetly waiting for me to take a sniff and stared hungrily at the glass in her hand.

Ohhhhhhh what the fuck…

I took the piece of glass from her and raised it to my nose while staring down at the white powder.

Here goes nothing.

I placed a finger on my left nostril and put the right one down on the cool square before sniffing up what was in front of me just like I’d seen her do shortly before. At first, my nose stung but I persisted and continued to let the substance drift in through my nose.

Once I came to the end of the line, my nose buzzed and my heart was beating deeply in my chest.

“Good boy.” She said while stroking my thigh.

Still in shock of what I just did, my eyes stayed glued to the powder on the square.

I needed more…

Without hesitation, I moved my face to the right and proceeded to sniff in the next line.

“Fuck.”

My head flew back and my eyes closed shut as I felt a euphoric sensation over take my body.

“Told you.” Eva snickered then snatched the glass from me and snorted the next line.

The way I was feeling right now was amazing. My body tingled and I was ready to take on another.

I reached my hand down and went to pick up the piece of glass, but Eva’s warm hand clamped down ontop of mine stopping me.

“Slow down big boy, not so much for your first time.” She said seductively.

We kept eye contact as our faces drew closer together. I wasn’t really aware of what was happening because my mind had taken me high and I was out of there.

Our lips connected, and she was immediately in for the kill. She straddled ontop of me grinding her making my high even better.

As she moved her hips around she trailed kisses along my jawline then made her way to my neck, biting softly leaving her mark.

In response, my hands gripped her ass while I too kissed her and nibbled lightly on her earlobe.

“Yall needa cut that shit out.” The same white dude that came at me the first time was looking at us a stern look in his red eyes.

Eva kissed me one last time before biting my lip and climbing from off of me.

I’m so fucking glad I snorted that line. I felt on top of the world and I had never felt like this before.

This is my first and last time trying it, I swear I will never snort again cause shit can get  addictive, but for right now I was enjoying the ride.

Serenity

 “You’re a fat ass.” Liam said as he watched me devour my bacon cheese burger in two bites. Liam and I were able to catch a last minute flight out to Cali right before take off and were driving from the airport back to his dorm.

I stuck my tongue out at him and he rolled his eyes at my childishness.

My hands reached up to the cup holder and I pulled out my strawberry milkshake taking a huge sip then placing it back in the holder.

“Slow down…” Liam half laughed but I could tell he was serious.

I continued to down my food, completely ignoring him then crumbled my trash up and threw it in the back seat.

Not even five minutes later did I feel my stomach twist in a huge knot and I was about heave all over the fucking dash board.

“Pull over.”

“Why?”

“PULL OVER DAMN IT!” I yelled and immediately his hands swerved the wheel to the left and the car slowed down.

As soon as I opened my door, I felt the food rise in my chest then in my throat and I was blowing chunks of food all on the curb.

“Grosssss.” I heard Liam coo in the background.

This nigga is about to get on my last nerve.

I swiped my face with the back of my hand then shut the door.

“I hate bacon burgers now… and strawberry milkshakes.” I said as my chest pumped lightly helping regulate my breathing.

“Take this.”

Liam reached into his pocket and pulled out a pack of tic tacs.

I opened my mouth to curse his fuck ass out but I was silenced by the food that threatened to escape my mouth.

Quickly, I yanked my head to the right and threw up some more on the curb.

“Ugh.” I said, my face scrunched in disgust.

“Yo, why have you been so sick lately…like damn all you do is throw up.”

I shrugged my shoulders then popped three tic tacs in my mouth before tossing them into Liam’s lap.

“I don’t know, it’s really weird. Now that I think about it, I’ve been throwing up a lot for a while now…mainly in the morning or late late at night…”

Liam had already pulled the car from the side of the road and we were back on the street going 60 in a 45. Liam stay driving fast for no fucking reason.

At first he was silent but then took short quick glances at me.

“What?”

He didn’t say anything but tapped his hand on the steering wheel repeatedly.

“What!!!” I said impatiently.

Liam sighed then released his foot from the gas a bit.

“When was your last period?”

My eye brow shot up and I frowned thinking about the answer.

“Uh……oh fuck.”

Liam sighed then made a quick u-turn.

“Where are you going?” I said my hands suddenly sweaty.

“We passed a drug store a few miles back…”

He didn’t even need to finish his sentence for me to know what he was talking about.

Fuck I better not be pregnant. This is the last mother fucking thing I need… Can I even carry this baby to term seeing as how sick I am?

How did this shit happen. I pinched the skin on the back of my hand in frustration and nervousness.

Well no shit it happened because I fucked without a condom a couple of times. Damn. In my head I tallied up how late I was on my period and I couldn’t help the groan that escaped from behind my lips.

“What’s wrong?”

I had to be a good two weeks late.  Even though Chris and I were in a funk, we still fucked and sometimes with out protection. I remember we had sex one last time before everything went to complete shit and Liam and I got back together…..

“Nothing…” I lied.

Liam didn’t respond but rather kept a tight grip on the wheel and stared straight ahead.

Please God, don’t let me be pregnant… 

Cloud Nine- Chapter 21 Part 1: Lovely Mornings

Short as hell but all i can put out at the moment. Leave feedback :)

_____________________-

Thanksgiving morning came in a heartbeat and I was ready to fucking eat. After Liam and I arrived at my parents house we immediately went upstairs and slept for the remainder of the night and didn’t wake up until now.

Well Liam was still sleep, the only reason I was awake was because I had to throw up again. Shit was getting annoying but it should end soon. Hopefully.

Standing above the toilet I flushed it and put the lid down before washing my hands and face. I brushed my teeth and pulled my now short brown hair into a ponytail. Not much of my hair has been coming out lately but I was still losing weight. I had to be about 105 pounds at this point. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared but what can I do about it?

After doing my personal hygiene I walked down the cherry wood stairs and into the kitchen to be greeted by my father.

“Morning dad.” I said hugging him and kissing his cheek.

“Morning sweetie. Not to throw anything at you this early but your mom is on her way over with your aunts and cousins. Just thought I’d let you know.”

“Fucking great.” I said sarcastically. My dad treats me like the adult I am and he doesn’t give two shits what I say about my mom because in all honesty he felt the same way.

“I know, just bare with it for today. You haven’t seen or talked to her in a few years. Just play nice.”

“Fine.” I muttered under my breath.

He petted my hair then returned to the stove and threw a few eggs into a pot. After about ten minutes my dad started cooking pancakes and bacon which sent a appetizing aroma throughout the kitchen.

“Mhm smells delicious.” I heard a voice say.

I turned my head and infront of me stood Felicia, my dad’s wife of a year in her pink robe and white bunny slippers.

“Hello darling.” She said this time looking at me.

“Hey.” I said then got up and got a cup of orange juice. Felicia and I had nothing in common and I hated small talk with her so I just decided to avoid anymore conversation and stuffed my mouth with a banana.

She smiled softly then walked over to my dad and helped him cook.

“Stop it baby you’re gonna make me burn myself!” I heard my dad half whisper half laugh.

My eyes slit to the right to get a peep of what was going on between them. Felicia was all up on my dad her arms snaked tightly around his waist and nibbling on his ear.

Oh for heaven’s sake please stop. It’s too early for all of that.

“Imma go check on Liam.” I said more to myself than to them before leaving the kitchen.

Quickly, I took the steps two at a time and semi skipped to the guest room that Liam and I were staying in. To my surprise he was already awake and wore only a red towel around his waist as he waited for the shower water to get nice and hot.

“Morning babe.” I said walking over to morning.

“Morning.” A slight smile crossed his face and he went in to kiss me. Absentmindely, my weight shifted upward as I got on my tippy toes and pecked him lightly.

“Now why you aint gimme none of this last night?” he asked while grabbing my ass.

“Liam please.” I pushed his hand away before  rolling my eyes and flipping on the T.V. Liam heaved then waltzed into the bathroom before shimming out of his towel.

“Care to join me?” He asked with a sly smirk.

There he go trying to find a way to get his dick work. He stay wanting to do sexual shit but to be honest it’s been a minute since Liam and I have been intimate so why not killing two birds with one stone.

“Sure.”

My legs swung over the bed and I walked into the bathroom already unbuttoning my pajama shirt and dancing out of my pants and undies. I never sleep with a bra on because that shit is so uncomfortable.

Together Liam and I climbed into the shower, but made sure the door was locked first before completely emerging ourselves behind the green floral curtain I’m sure Felicia picked out.

The hot water splashed onto my delicate skin as I lathered natural smelling soap onto Liam’s back leaving white suds along the way.

I washed the whole back part of his body before turning him around to face me so I could wash his front. Just as I expected, his friend was at full attention staring right at me.

“Whhatt??!” He laughed.

I shook my head then began running the soapy towel across his chest and stomach. As my hands went lower and lower, now washing his hips I could see a huge kool aid smile cross his lips.

“Well let’s get to it.” I said. I’m not really in the mood, but because I’m a awesome girlfriend and I know I’ve been holding out I’ll put out for him. Who knows, I might actually get into after a while.

Liam’s hands flew quickly to my hips and he hoisted me up so that my legs were wrapped tightly around his waist.

Gently he pushed me up against the shower wall and began devoring my neck as he slowly entered me, moving his hips in circles in side of me. The water of the shower was still beating hot on my skin but I didn’t mind.

The tips of my fingernails trailed lightly on his back before clenching tightly into his skin.

“Shit Liam.” Unexpectedly, he was hitting my g-spot perfectly. His stroke continued to get deeper and deeper but varied in speed as he moved in and out of me.

Light moans escaped both of our lips as he worked at a constant pace and my lips came in contact with his.

“Right there…”I said against his mouth.

Liam groaned a few times before putting me down and flipping me around so that my back was toward him and my hands stationed on the wall to keep balance.

Without missing a beat, Liam removed himself then inserted himself back into me this time keeping a quick pace.

I felt his warm hands cup my breast as he worked his fingers in circles over my nipples causing me to moaned loudly.

“Shut the fuck up, damn.” Liam scolded. But I couldn’t help it, he was hitting just right and I could feel myself near my peak.

My body bounced lightly on top of him as he continued to hit it from the back and I bit deep into my lip to suppress the moan that was about to leave my mouth yet again.

“I-I’m there.” I said clenching myself around him and bouncing quicker.

Liam continued to work his fingers on my nipples and plow himself inside of me all the while trailing light kisses down my shoulder and back.

It didn’t take much longer before I felt an amazing feeling fill my body and make me partially scream in pleasure.

“Ohhhhh.” I said bouncing a few more times then stopping.

Liam wasn’t finished yet so I just waited for him to pump a few more times and sure enough he came to.

“Thanks babe.” He said turning me around and gripping my ass. I didn’t respond rather smiled then kissed him passionately on the lips.

Cloud Nine- Chapter 20: Long Road Ahead

Chris

A few days later

“Last night was great sweetie.” Some bitch cooed in my ear. I scrunched my nose and turned my head at her morning breath. I don’t do all that lovey dovey shit first thing in the morning, you needa brush yo damn teeth before trying fuck with me first thing. Shit’s gross, I don’t know how other people do it. Bitch just needed to keep her mouth closed and leave. I rolled my eyes at the smile that was forming on her lips and rolled out of bed.

“When you leaving?” I said while grabbing some fresh clothes and a towel.

In the background I could hear her little voice scoff then the bed creak as her heavy footsteps crossed the floor.

“Why you rushing me…I was hoping for another round.” She said with optimism her voice as she snaked her arms around my waist.

My lips formed into a tight smile before I pulled her arms from around me.

“Naw, I’m good. But you really need to leave.” I said getting annoyed. I was being nicer than a mother fuck and if she didn’t leave soon she would see a side I didn’t want to show.

“Whatever.” She rolled her eyes and flipped her long auburn hair before waltzing over to get her stuff from off of my dresser.

Last night was fucking wild which partly explained the random hoe I woke up with this morning.  Aaron had invited me to this insane house party with bad bitches busting at the seams, but the best part about it was that they were easy as fuck. All night, I was either smoking or drinking something unknown in my red plastic cup while keeping a fine bitch on my lap to keep me company. It had to be at least three or four in the morning when I came stumbling into my dorm with Jasmine all up on my dick.

Or maybe her name was Jackie…wait no..it was Jane. Fuck I aint know nor did I care.

“You’re gonna call me alright baby.” she said while staring up at me with her deep green and gold eyes.

Was she asking me or was she telling me? And fuck she calling me baby for?

“Lo—.”
“Shh, I didn’t ask you to speak.” She said while placing a creamy vanilla colored finger over my lips.

Okay this bitch was really pissing me off.

“Girl bye.”

I snatched her hand from my face and practically pushed her out the door before slamming it behind her.

Bitches stay catching feelings and aint nobody got time for that.

 Quickly, I cleaned my room and changed the sheets on my bed before taking a nice long shower and doing some laundry. Today was going to be boring as hell because I was anxious for tomorrow to come.

Thanksgiving was tomorrow and I was supposed to be flying back to Virginia to go have dinner with Momma and the rest of my family. At first, Serenity and I were supposed to go see Momma for two days then the day before Thanksgiving fly to her parent’s place for the actual day. But unfortunately shit changed and I was left a with an extra ticket to Virginia that I didn’t know what to do with.

Thinking about Momma made me miss her and I decided to give her a quick call while I waited on my clothes to dry.

My hand slithered into the front of my pocket and I pulled out my black HTC touch screen then held down the number two and waited for the phone to ring.

I have momma on speed dial, so fucking what? I’m a momma’s boy and I have no shame admitting that.

“Hello?”

“Hey Momma.” I said a smile crossing my lips. Hearing her voice was everything to me right now.

“Aw Chris baby how are you?” she asked with enthusiasm in her voice.

“I’m good momma, I just missed hearing your voice.” I admitted.

“I miss you too sweetie, I’ve been meaning to call you…”she trailed. Knowing momma she was probably busy making or baking something for somebody.

“About what?” I asked but she didn’t respond.

“Hello??!?!”

“Oh! Sorry honey but I wanted to know what time you and Serenity are going to be here so I know when to send Alonso.”

Who the fuck is Alonso? Completely ignoring her question, I opened my mouth to question her about this mystery guy she was sending to come and get me. I know momma is a grown woman and deserves to be happy but ever since the whole abuse bullshit with my stepdad I aint been cool with dudes she claims are just “friends”.

“Momma who is Alonso?” I held the phone close to my ear and waiting for her to speak on the other end.

“Chris baby he is my boyfriend okay? Don’t stress about it.” She said. I know the smile she was once wearing was slowly fading away.

“Fuck no, I don’t like this at all. “Alonso” aint coming to get me and he sure as hell will not be eating dinner with us on Thursday. Understand?” My blood was boiling and I could feel my face getting hot.

The fuck is she doing going around getting boyfriends? I don’t trust no nigga with my momma and this new nigga better keep his distance.

“First off watch yourself. I’m a grown woman and I have needs too.”
I rolled my eyes and cut her off before she continued talking.

“Momma please, spare me the details…. I don’t want to hear about some random dude pressed up on my moms.”

“Whatever Chris. Feel how you want about it, but Alonso treats me good and I think I’m falling in love with him. Needless to say, he will be around for a while and he will most definitely be at the dinner.”

I sucked my teeth then fell back into my seat.

“So when are yall coming?” she asked directing the conversation back to her previous question. I still hadn’t told her about what happened with Serenity and I but I guess now was best.

“Serenity aint coming, we broke up so it’s just gone be me. I’ll be there around 10 tomorrow morning.”

“I’m sorry to hear that baby but we can talk more about it when you get here, I gotta go Alonso just came with the turkey. Love you, smooches!” She made a loud kissing noise into the phone but shortly after I was greeted with the dial tone.

I shook my head back and forth and blew out a huge breath before placing my phone back into my pocket. This was complete bullshit. I don’t fuck with this Alonso nigga but if Momma’s happy then I’m happy.

Eva

“But sis why?”

I was on the phone with my baby sister and she was telling me that she couldn’t come pick me up from my dorm to go home for the holiday. I would take myself but my car has been in the shop for the past few days and wont be out till next week.

“Sorry E, something came up…you can ride the bus though?”
The bus? She got me fucked up.

“Fuck I look like riding the bus huh? Man whatever, yall always pulling some shit with me. I don’t even care anymore. Bye.”

I ended the call and threw my phone on the cushion. Right now, I was chilling in the game room half watching Maury and eating a bowl of cereal when I had got the call from my sister. I can’t believe they’re doing this to me AGAIN. This isn’t the first holiday I’ve spent alone because something “came up.” Whatever fuck them. I’ll just kick it here like I do every year this time.

After finishing my bowl of Captain Crunch, I put the bowl on the floor and kicked my feet up on the couch while painting my finger nails. Once I let my nails dry, I got on twitter and played a few games on the PS3.

God I was so freaking bored. I wonder what Chris is up to?

I pulled out my phone and dialed his number only hearing two rings before his voice came through the phone.

“Aye, what you doing?”

“Chilling you?” he asked.

“Same.” I said back.

He didn’t respond and it was just a awkward silence over the phone.

“Sooo what you doing Thursday?” I asked breaking the silence.

“Going back to VA.”

“Forreal? That’s my hometown.”

“Word?”

“Mhmmm.”

“Well, I got a extra ticket wanna come with me?”

“Yesss! Thanks yo.”

“No problem, the flight leaves late tonight. I’ll text you when I’m on the way to get you.”

“Aight.”

I hung up the phone and smiled big as fuck. Spending the holiday with Chris sure as hell beat seeing my dumb ass family. But I wonder why he had a extra ticket though? Oh well, I don’t care as long as me and Chris can chill and have a great time I’m good. Low key ever since the day I met Chris at Gina’s Playhouse, I’ve had strong feelings for him. That’s why I invited him to Fallen Angels that night even though I knew Serenity hated that place. Chris wasn’t happy, I could see it in his eyes and I just wanted to see him smile so that was the only thing I could think of.

 I know it’s fucked up but Serenity and him were never going to last. And obviously I was right. Slowly, I’m planting my seed and I know that in no time we will be together.

Serenity

“Liam hurry the fuck up!”

Liam and I had just landed in Seattle and we were running through the terminals looking for the shuttle bus that would take us to where we needed to be. If we didn’t find this bus right now we’d be fucked and I refuse to wait another three hours in the airport for a fucking bus to pick us up.

“Well if you’d help me out, I wouldnt be slow.”

“Oh shut up, you have two fucking bags.” I rolled my eyes and scoffed at him. Liam been bitching ever since we left our airport back in Cali. The whole freaking flight here he was either complaining about the food or some other petty shit. To be quite honest I wasn’t paying him no attention.

Liam quickened his pace and he was hot behind me. My eyes scanned the terminal and street at all the cars passing by looking for the big blue and yellow double decker bus that we were supposed to be on.

“Shit, I think it left already.”

I glanced quickly down at my pink G shock and read the numbers on the tiny screen. “Damn it Liam, if your ass would have just listened to me we would be out this bitch by now.” I said irritated.

My hands fell into my carry on and I snatched out a half filled Ozarka water bottle and put it to my lips.

“You needa chill with that. I aint down for the way you talking out the side of your neck right now. I was just trying to make sure everything was right so we didn’t have to back track!” he scoffed and dropped the bags.

I rolled my eyes and looked out ahead of me searching for the bus. I jumped up a few times to see over a few people heads and right when I was about to give up I saw the big blue and yellow bus park on the other side of the street.

“There it is!” I said excitedly while grabbing my shit.

“Where??”

Oh my gosh, would he just trust me and follow my fucking lead for once. This nigga never liked not being in control and directing shit.

“Follow me, come on.”

I quickly jogged with my belongings and headed for the bus. Right when I stepped to the back of the bus it started to slowly take off.

“Wait!” I wailed my long arms and picked up my pace before I was finally jogging with the speed of the bus.

Luckily, there was traffic in the terminals so the bus was able to stop and let us board.

“Thanks.” I said to the driver. He just waved me off and I walked to the back of the bus and found Liam and I a place to sit.

“God I’m so tired.” I said falling back into the bus seat.

“Me too.” Liam confessed.

I rested my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes but I didn’t fall asleep. For the past couple of days I’ve been feeling pretty sick besides my normal sickness. Like I’ve been throwing up and shit.

I remember me and Liam went to a sushi bar a few days ago and I think I got food poisoning but I honestly don’t know. My head was constantly spinning and my stomach got upset easily. Before we came on the trip I downed a few aspirins and some pepto bismol to help soothe my pain. For now it was working on my stomach but the aspirin was wearing off.

The bus rocked us back and forth as it traveled on the bumpy streets and onto the highway.

To be honest I wasn’t ready to face my family but I’m just going to try and make amends with my parents and have a good time.

Cloud Nine- Chapter 19 Part 2: Good Ones Go

Chapter 19 Part 2

Chris

“This is the best pizza you will ever have, I promise.”

After leaving the club, Eva and I decided to grab something to eat. I was still pretty buzzed but I was aware of my surroundings still. Right now we were at Pablo’s Pizza about to eat a supreme.

Business was slow and not many people were in the parlor so our food came quickly.

My hand reached across the table and picked up the greasy slice of pizza before placing it in my mouth and eating it all in two bites.

“Damn nigga slow down!” She laughed.

I laughed with her before picking up another slice and shoving it into my mouth.

“So you single now?”

My eyes looked up from the pizza and over at her but she was just tapping away at her phone, an unreadable expression on her face.

“Y-yeah, I think so..why?” I pressed.

She clicked her nails at the phone a couple more times before raising her face to look at me.

“Just curious.” She said before eating her pizza again.

“Mhmm.” I said never taking my eyes away from her. She wasn’t just “curious” she asked that shit for a reason.

“But you know I’m thinking about apologizing to Serenity…I’m feeling kinda guilty about how I went about the shit.” I said watching her expression.

Her eyes went from sparkling to something sad but a smile never left her face.

“Yeah, you was wrong for that.”

“I know but how else was I suppose to tell her?” I asked while taking a pepperoni off of my slice.

“To be honest you should of told her how you felt a long ass time ago. How would you feel if the tables were turned?”

 “I tried! But I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Every time I wanted to she’d hit with the I love you card and all this other shit and I just didn’t know how to go about it.”

“You need to apologize.” She said while putting down the crust of the pizza on her plate.

I sighed heavy then wiped my face with a napkin.

“Fine, but I don’t know what to say. Plus what if she try and get back with me? I was serious when I said I wanted a break. To be honest I really miss our friendship, things were better off that way. Confusing my love for her as a friend for a  girlfriend was the worst mistake I ever made.” I confessed.

I should have listened to my gut and took shit slow, now Serenity probably never wants to see me again. I want her in my life but only as friend, nothing else.

Eva smiled weakly and took my hand in hers before opening her mouth to speak.

“At least you know you’re wrong, I’m sure she’ll understand.”

I nodded then slid my hand from underneath hers.

“Well I’m about to head out then.”

“Tell me how it goes.”

“Aight.”

I pulled on my windbreaker before dropping two twenties on the table.

“You aint gotta worry about it, I got it.” She said pushing the money over to me.

“Naw it’s okay.”

“Chris I’m serious.” Her voice was strained and she arched her eyebrow at me. Was she about to get mad over some petty shit like this?

“You good.” I said quickly before pulling out of the booth and walking out the door before she could say anything else.

Once I was outside, I looked behind me and through the window I could see her flicking me off. I laughed lightly before climbing into my car and starting the engine.

The whole way back to Serenity’s I contemplated what I was going to say to her and how I was going to get her to forgive me.

I didn’t mean to hurt you, I was just scared of the future.

Hell no. I shook my head back and forth getting rid of that thought.

You know you’re my world, but it’s better we just stay friends.

Shit, not that either.

Fuck it, I’ll just say whatever comes to mind.

Cautiously, I pulled my car into a empty parking spot and snatched my keys out of the ignition before stepping out onto the concrete.

On my way up, we need to talk…just hear me out.

My phone vibrated as I typed at the key pad then placed it back into my pocket. By now, I was already on Serenity’s floor and a few doors away from hers.

As I approached her door, I breathed in a big gulp of air bracing myself for what was to come.

Here goes nothing.

Knock.

I knocked once and waited for an answer but nothing happened. I knocked a second time and jiggled the handle.

Let me in now. We need to talk. I said against the door. Inside I could hear a few things fall and a mumble of voices before she finally opened the door.

“What do you want.” She said rudely.

I looked down at her and she was covered up in only a sheet. Her hair was all over the place and she pouted her lips softly.

“Fuck you aint got no clothes on for?” My calmness was quickly oozing out of me and was being replaced with anger. There better not be another nigga in her room because I’ll fuck shit up.

“What’s it to you?” she said with attitude in her voice. I sighed and got down to her level to make sure she heard me.

“Don’t fuck with me right now, I’m trying to fucking apologize to you.”

 Her nose scrunched up and her hand flew up to her face.

“You smell like shitty alcohol, get the hell out of my face.” She said trying to close the door, but I stuck my foot in between the gap before she could close the door.

“Stop that shit! I’m trying to be the bigger person and you aint even letting me make shit right!”

Immediately, her eyes went from regular to wide and crazy while her mouth curled back into frustration.

“Bigger person? Nigga please, you have some fucking nerve coming here and talking like that. Just take your shit and leave.”

She slammed the door in my face but returned shortly after with a small brown box and a plastic bag.

“Here.” She smashed it against my chest and popped her hand on her hip.

I looked down at the box then back up at her.

“Leave!” she shouted looking impatiently. This was the first time she had ever been this upset before.

“Just hear me o-.”

“No! I don’t want to listen to any more of your lies. Just go now.”

I ignored her and tried pressing my way into her room.

“S-stop.” She said struggling to keep the door closed, but I stuck my foot in the gap and held it open while my free hand gently pushed her out the way.

“Why can’t I come in huh?” I pressed still trying to get in her room.

We wrestled around with the door for a bit before I gave up trying to get through.

“FINE! I’m leaving.” I said turning around but right when she went to close the door I pushed on it and it flew open easily.

She shrieked loudly and tried to get me out but I saw everything I needed to see.

Serenity

Shit. Shit. Shit.

I knew I shouldn’t have let my guard down.

“Why the fuck is he here!” Chris yelled while pointing over at Liam who was laying in my bed with only a pair of basketball shorts on. Quickly, I shut my door behind me before anyone heard us yelling and snatched a shirt over my head.

“Why does it matter? You left me, so anything I do from here on out is none of your fucking business!” I yelled back at him. Liam rolled out of the bed and came to stand beside me.

A look of disbelief crossed Chris’s face before he huffed and surprisingly surrendered.

“Look, I’m done arguing with you. I’m sorry for fucking you over and I hope you forgive me. You’ll always have a place in my heart but we just need to not see each other for a while. I wish yall well.”

My mouth flew open and I was in total shock. I really wasn’t expecting him to say that. Quickly, he grabbed his stuff and started for my door. He opened the door and I watched him as he made his way down the hall way and into the elevator.

“Glad he’s out the picture.” Liam said before laying back down in my bed.

I shook my head and I went to lay at his side.

“I don’t want to talk about it, I just want to sleep.”

Liam shrugged then picked up the remote and switched off the t.v. before getting settled into the covers.

“Goodnight.” he said.

“Night.”

Liam pecked me on my cheek and rested his arm around me and I cuddled into him before drifting off into a deep slumber. 

Cloud Nine- Chapter 19 Part 1: A Dying Love

Chapter 19 part 1

Serenity

My head was resting in the crook of Liam’s neck and his cheek rested on top of my hair while he massaged my hand in small circles.

I honestly don’t know how I feel about this “promise” ring. There is no possible way I can keep this shit! Fuck, why did he give this to me? Now my feelings are jacked and I’m torn.

“Liam I gotta call Chris really quick.” I said lifting my head. He sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes before lifting his head from on top of mine.

“Why do you always do that?” I asked while pulling out my phone.

“Because he took my fucking spot and I don’t even know why! Ever since that nigga popped up out of nowhere me and you were never on the same page after that. It was always Chris this and Chris that, like the fuck? I went from being number one to number two within a few short months but the funny thing was that he didn’t even look at you like that which is what pisses me off even more. How am I supposed to feel knowing that my girl got eyes for another nigga?”

“Ex-girl…” I trailed.

He just stared at me with a blank expression and tapped his eyelids close three or four times before sighing.

“You completely missed the point.”
I ignored him and his glare by punching in Chris’s number on my Iphone.

Ring, Ring..

“Yeah..” Chris voice came through the phone bland and flat. In the background I could hear loud music bumping and talking.

“Where are you?” I asked while pushing the volume up on my phone.

Chris was quiet on the other end, nothing but ghetto loud music pumped through the phone.

“Answer me asshole!” I yelled. I hate repeating myself and he was pressing my patience. I shouldn’t have to ask his ass twice what he was doing because I know he heard me loud and clear, he was just be ignorant and annoying on purpose.

Chris’s voice cracked through the phone soft and in a hushed tone so I didn’t quite catch what he said.

“What?”

“Fallen Angels!!!” he shouted.

I’m going to kill him, why was he there without me? We agreed no strip clubs unless I was there with him and on top of that it’s where Eva worked. Suddenly, I was uncomfortable and agitated, fuck he doing there?

“Chris you know I don’t want you there!” I said getting angry.

“Just like you be telling me, I’m grown and can do whatever the fuck I want.” He said nonchalantly.

“But as my boyfriend you should respect my wishes and most off all ME! If I asked you not to fucking go, then you aint need to go! I swear to god Chris if you seen Eva dance imma fuck you  up.” I said as my voice rose. At this point I was pissed the fuck off and ready to go down to Fallen Angels myself and find his ass.

How dare he? He should have enough respect for me to not do anything like this!

“Serenity shut the fuck up! You stay blowing shit out of proportion! Eva wanted me to come and you acting like I’m cheating on you or some shit! I really don’t see the problem you are just being annoying as fuck.”

“Fine you want to waste money on other bitches then by all means do whatever you want I don’t give a damn. But if you decide to stay just know that I’m mad at your ass and I don’t want to see you until I’m ready.” I said frustrated.

“Fucking great! I’m happy, didn’t feel like being around you anyway!”

W-what? 

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Serenity we need to take a break or some shit cause I aint down for this anymore.” He said plainly.

“This? What’s this?”

The phone made a few noises before Chris’s voice came through.

“Us. Me and you. It’s not working. Ever since we had sex for the first time my heart aint been in it. I realized after that night I want to do my own thing.”

“So why the fuck did you string me along for another two months?? WHY! You got me all caught up and shit. The least you could’ve done was told me how you felt jackass.”

Even though on the outside I looked mad and upset on the inside I was hurting extremely bad.  

“I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

This nigga swear, ooh I hate him so much.

“Fuck you Chris. I can’t believe you’d do something like this to me…. I truly do hate you. Don’t talk to me ever again, I’ll pack your shit. Goodbye.”

Chris

Right now, Aaron and I were in a nicer section of the club waiting on Eva. Earlier, Eva had sent someone to get us and move us here.  The view was even more amazing from where we were. Half naked females danced everywhere around us and I was in heaven.

Throughout the night, Aaron and I had a handful of lap dances and drinks. Even though I’m under aged, Aaron was twenty one so that wasn’t a problem. By now, my thoughts were everywhere and my vision was starting to blur.

“Hi boys.” A soft voice spoke from behind us and when we turned around, there stood Eva and some hoe with barely anything on. A seductive smile were on both of their lips and my mouth couldn’t help but start to water.

Eva looked too fucking good right now. Whether or not that was liquor talking, I didn’t give a fuck because I was just enjoying myself.

“Hey ladies.” Aaron said while keeping his eyes glued to their exposing skin.

Eva smiled then leaned in to the other girl’s ear. She whispered something I couldn’t hear and then the girl started to laugh.

“Why we keeping secrets?” I asked.

They both laughed then the other girl walked around to Aaron and took his hand in hers.

 “You’re coming with me.” She said slyly.

Aaron’s mouth fell open slightly as he followed behind the girl his eyes never leaving her ass.

Eva walked around to where Aaron was sitting and crossed her legs before looking up at me, her eyes twinkling.

Her hair was curled all around her and she was wearing a one piece outfit that had a slit down the middle so that her boobs were easily visible.

“Enjoying yourself so far?” she asked while licking her lips.

She was too fine right now.

“Hell yeah.” I said trying to sound smooth.

“Good because the night is just getting started. I told you it’s really fun here I don’t know why Serenity be tripping.” She said.

Involuntarily, I rolled my eyes when she said Serenity’s name.

“Yall good?” She asked when she saw me roll my eyes.

“Yeah, it’s just… complicated.”

Speaking of Serenity, I should see if she texted me. I know she probably going crazy cause I aint call her.

I looked down at my phone and nothing showed any calls or texts. This is a bit surprising seeing as how she stay blowing my shit up but then again she is my girl… I locked my phone and right as I was placing it back into my jean pocket it started to vibrate vigorously in my hand.

Without even looking at the caller I.D. I raised it to my ear.

“Yeah.” I said blankly.

“Where are you?” Her voice was needy and urgent.

Why the fuck does she need to know where I am at all the damn time. This is exactly why I need to be single, I hate checking in with her like she’s my mother or some shit.

It’s time to slow things down all the fucking way.

I didn’t answer her on purpose so she could get pissed off and sure enough she went ballistic. I took this as an opportunity to go ahead and do what needed to be done. After her questioning me some more, I just went ahead and laid it on her.

“Serenity we need to take a break or some shit cause I aint down for this anymore.” I said plainly.

Eva’s head snapped up and her eyes were wide.

“What are you doing?” She mouthed. I shook my head and proceeded.

“This? What’s this?” I could hear her voice change and for a second I doubted whether I should go through with it but my drunken mouth spoke before my thoughts where completely clear.

“Us. Me and you. It’s not working. Ever since we had sex for the first time my heart aint been in it. I realized after that night I want to do my own thing.”

Again, she yelled at me through the phone but I just moved it from my ear and waited a few seconds before putting it back only catching the tail end of her last sentence.

“I didn’t want to hurt your feelings.”

I probably sounded like a complete jerk off but fuck it, shit was through no need to feel bad.

“Fuck you Chris. I can’t believe you’d do something like this to me…. I truly do hate you. Don’t talk to me ever again, I’ll pack your shit. Goodbye.” Then the phone clicked.

I shrugged my shoulders and put my phone into my pocket then looked up at Eva.

“Yo, what the fuck?” she said totally surprised.

“Told you it was complicated.” I said casually.

She shook her head then an unreadable expression crossed her made up face.

“This is all my fault, I should have never invited you. Now serenity is gonna hate me.”

“Don’t sweat it, if anything she’s more pissed with me than you.”

“God, I feel so awful… I’m always messing things up.” She said throwing her hands up in surrender.

I shook my head and placed my hand on her leg. Her eyes looked down at my hand then back at me.

“I said don’t worry about it.”

She shook her head up and down but said nothing.

The background music was still pumping loudly and it was starting to annoy me. My head was already pounding from the many shots of alcohol that I took earlier and I was ready to leave.

“Let’s get out of here.” I said over the music.

“But what about your friend?” She yelled back.

Damn, I completely forgot about Aaron.

“He can get a cab, he don’t need me.” I said.

She stared at me with a skeptical look in her eyes before finally agreeing.

“Okay.”

Serenity

I hung up the phone before he could say anything else and threw it on the carpet. Tears swelled in my eyes and I was at lost for words. I can’t believe this is happening. Not only had I just lost my boyfriend, but my fucking best friend as well.

Against my will, tears streamed down my face and rolled off onto my hands.

“It’s okay, you don’t deserve him. You can do so much better.” Liam said.

 I sighed then stood up from the bed and yanked the promise ring from my finger.

“Get the fuck out.” I said throwing the ring at him. I know Liam didn’t deserve this but I wanted to be alone.

He picked up the ring from off the floor and walked over to me before wrapping his arms tightly around my body.

“Fuck off of me!” I said struggling beneath his grip. I pushed and kicked but he just held on to me.

“No.” he protested.

I kept squirming around but it was no use, he was too strong.

“I know how you feel.” He said into my ear.

How he think he know how I feel? This nigga don’t know shit.

“No the fuck you dont.” I muttered into his arm finally giving up. Both of these niggas fucked with my emotions and I’m completely drained.

Liam sighed then picked me up.

“Put me down!” I said angrily.

He just carried me to my bed and laid me gently on the pillows. Slyly, he placed the ring back on my finger and climbed in the bed with me.

“Come here.” He said softly.

Hell no, he needed to get the fuck up.

“Get out my bed, I said I wanted to be alone.”

“How stupid do you think I am? You know good and damn well you don’t want to be alone, now come here.”

I sighed and scooted over towards him. Like many times before, I placed my head on his chest while his hands fell in my hair. He ran his fingers through my hair and oddly in his arms I felt so much better.

Constantly, I wiped at my face and sniffed to try and stifle any tears that were threatening to fall from my face.

“It’s okay to cry baby girl.”

My body tensed when he said that. Only Chris calls me baby girl, it was weird hearing Liam say it.

Obidently, I released the tears and watched them as they stained his shirt. Before I knew it, silent slow tears turned into quick whimpers and in no time at all I was balling my fucking eyes out.

“Let it all out.” He said comforting me.

Why did I ever let my feelings for Chris ruin Liam and I’s relationship. Shit, why did I even have feelings for that nigga in the first place?

Sitting here with Liam in this moment made me realize that I lucked out on probably the best thing I will ever have.

Even through neglecting and taking up for Chris instead of him, Liam stayed around and loved me unconditionally. It doesn’t get any better than him.

“Thank you.” I said wiping my eyes and propping myself up to look at him.

“No problem.” He said then smiled that smile I fell in love with so many years ago. I smiled back and searched deeply in his eyes.

Simultaneously, our smiles faded and the air in between us changed. Liam’s hand cupped my cheek and pushed back lose hair behind my ear.

My mind was running a thousand miles a minute and I bit down hard into my bottom lip.

My slender fingers wrapped around the collar of his shirt and I pulled him up towards me. Hesitantly, I inched closer and he licked his lips while keeping eye contact with me.

The heat in my body was starting to rise and a tingly sensation overtook me. Slowly, I closed the distance between us and our lips meshed with one another. His kiss was leisurely and sweet and his lips tasted of anticipation and love, just how I left him.

I pulled away and he rested his head against mine.

“I missed you so much.” he said

I smiled weakly and breathed in his scent.

“Me too.” I said truthfully. I never stopped loving Liam, he was my first real boyfriend, first guy I ever had a sex with and my first love. There was no possible way I could forget about him and occasionally I did miss him.

His white teeth flashed quickly as he smiled before his lips met mine again but only this time he slithered his tongue on top of mine and I climbed on top of him, our chests pressed together and our hands intertwined together by our side.

We kissed passionately, our lips moving in sync with one another and my heart was beating quickly in my chest.  

So this was it Chris and I were finally through. 

Cloud Nine- Chapter 18: Confused

Chapter 18

Two months later…

Serenity

Slowly but surely my long luscious curly hair was falling out by the chunks so I decided to just get it cut into a nice bob. The smooth skin beneath my eyes began to transform into slight blue and purple spots ridden with tiredness as my already petite body slimmed even smaller; losing at least twenty to thirty pounds against my will. The pink vibrant glow that once showed in my cheeks was now gone and any life that was left in my eyes were no longer there.

 Ever since the day Chris and I had sex, things just weren’t the same anymore. He’s been really distant and lately he has been spending a lot of time with Eva. Despite numerous tries, I couldn’t hate Eva, I actually grew quite fond of her. She was really funny and outgoing, not to mention supportive. Sometimes she would take me to the hospital for my treatments or run and get my medicine from the pharmacy. My heart just couldn’t help but have a spot for her. She’s doing everything Avery wasn’t and I’m grateful for that.

Speaking of Avery, me and her had a falling out and I don’t fuck with her no more. Just as I thought that day back in government class about her making a move on Chris came true and the sad thing about it was that it happened more than once! At first I didn’t believe Chris when he told me that she was making passes at him until I saw it happen when she thought I wasn’t paying any attention.

“Serenity believe me, he came onto me!” she had shouted through the phone.

“I saw you with my own two fucking eyes Avery!!!! So stop lying to me I am not a dumb ass! Don’t talk to me ever again please.”

It was a little upsetting to know that I couldn’t spend the end of my life with my best friend but oddly I was at peace with my decision to drop her.

But of course shit got even more complicated after dropping Avery. Now that Eva was around more I could see Chris growing much more attached to her. Realization that I was losing Chris to her didn’t set in until I grasped that I couldn’t make him smile anymore. At least not as easily as Eva could. Shit hurt but I just wasn’t ready to let him go.

My time was quickly drifting away from me and I was at stage four cancer. The doctor wasn’t lying when he told me it was progressing quickly; I just never thought it be this fast.

Chris and I are still together but the spark that he once had is no longer there. Now for Liam and Grayson on the other hand, it seems like every time I’m around either one of them, their once gray sky would turn sunny and bright.

Shit was turning sour fast and occasionally I thought about breaking things off with Chris but I could never bring myself to do it. Firstly, if I break up with Chris I’d feel like a coward and a failure. All couples go through their rough patches and I’m sure this was just a phase between us. I did not hold my tongue for all these years to only have him for a measly two months or so. Secondly, Grayson would get what he wanted.

And lastly, if I broke things off with Chris I know Liam would try to get back with me. Don’t get me wrong, I love Liam and my feelings for him started to grow even more.

Right now I was resting in my bed watching Chris get dress on the other side of the room. Even though we were going through it, we still tried to have sex at least two times within every two weeks. Not a lot I know but it was enough to satisfy me.

A small smile danced onto my lips as I watched him yank his beanie over his soft curls before he slipped his wrist through his watch.  

“I’ll talk to you later about how we are to get to your parents okay?” he asked looking over at me. He was fully clothed now in his jeans and crewneck sweater. Thanksgiving was around the corner and Chris and I thought it be best we spent it at my parents. They still don’t know I am sick and I didn’t plan on telling them either.

“Okay, give me a kiss before you leave.”

Chris rolled his eyes and walked over to me before pecking me on my lips and exiting my room. I don’t know why he was giving me the cold shoulder but I just shrugged it off.

Once Chris left I texted Liam to come pick me up and take me out to do something. I was not about to just lie at home alone and wallow in my sorrows.  

Chris

Being rude to Serenity is the only way I can wing myself off of her. Loving her these past few months has been a harder battle than I expected. My emotional side was hardening and I was ready to just be single and fuck other girls. This faithful shit was starting to way in on me.

I honestly don’t know where this sudden change of heart came from but being tied down just wasn’t anything I wanted to do right now.

 I feel bad as fuck treating her like this but I already know that when that dreaded day comes I will lose all sanity so why keep getting my emotions involved? I know it should be about Serenity right now but what about me? What about when she is long gone and I’m just left here alone with only memories of her? Why would I put myself through such emotional distress? Shit just wasn’t worth it.

My phone vibrated quickly in my pants pocket and I saw Eva’s name flash across the screen.

“Aye.” I said into the phone.

“Heeyy, you should come see me tonight!!” she said excitedly.

“Alright what you got in mind?”  

“This is gonna sound crazy but I want you to come to Fallen Angels tonight.”

One thing I didn’t learn about Eva until a while back was that she danced at a local club. She said she’s only been dancing for about four months now but planned on leaving soon. Unlike the other hoes who dance there, Eva wasn’t trying to make a career out of it. She only does it to help pay for school and to save enough so that when she graduates she can have her own place.

The day she told me and Serenity she worked there I swore off to Serenity I wouldn’t step foot in Fallen Angels and I didn’t want to break that promise.

“Eva you know I can’t go.”

“Come on I’m sure it’ll be fine.” She pleaded.

“I don’t know, it’s going to be awkward as fuck if I go by myself plus I’m broke as hell.”

“Dude, stop being a pussy and come, I’m sure if you hit up one of your boys they’ll go with you. I promise it’ll be fun!!!”

“But what if Serenity finds out?”

“Whose gonna tell her?”

Whoaaa. I am definitely not about that sneaky shit but I knew if I didn’t give in to her, she’d never give up on asking me to go.

“Fine.” I said in surrender.

“Yayyy! Be there by ten alright?”

“Yep, bye.” I said before hanging up the phone.

I’m sure Serenity wouldn’t mind me going this one time, I mean I’m only going to support Eva. Right?

Serenity

“Ahhh, I’m dizzy!” I yelled over to Liam. We were at an amusement park spinning around in the tea cup ride. My now jaw length hair whipped around in my face as my hands pulled on the silver rim faster and faster.

“Then stop spinning it dummy!” Liam yelled back.

I just ignored him and kept spinning us around letting the fresh air fill my nose and kiss at my cheeks. In this moment I felt so alive, the way the sun beamed on my frail body gave me life and I loved it. Hearing laughter and happiness all around me gave me a sense of comfort and relief.

After what seemed like only seconds, the tea cups stopped spinning and the steel bars that kept us strapped down in the seats lifted up.

“Thank you for riding the Tea Cups and come back as many times as you like!” the person who was working the ride said into the mic.

Liam came to my side and stuck his hand out for me to take. I placed my hand in his and jumped down from the ride before exiting through the small gate.

“That was a lot of fun!” Liam said.

“I know I loved it! Now let’s go do something else!” I said jumping up and down like a little kid.

“Okay okay, calm down, what do you want to do?” he laughed.

I stopped jumping and looked around me. The sky was shifting from it’s bright baby blue to a hazy mix of oranges and pinks. The sun still shined brightly but had a red glow to it. Kids, teenagers and even adults ran around the park with kool-aid smiles plastered upon their cheerful faces.

My eyes wandered from ride to ride but everything was either too crowded or we had already been on it.

“OOH! The ferris wheel! Let’s go!” I said as my eyes fell on the ride. The line was short and we hadn’t had a chance to ride it yet.

I wrapped my hand tightly around Liam’s wrist and pulled him towards the ride. We had arrived just in time before a older couple beat us to it.

Liam stepped in the blue oval first and trailed lightly behind him. I reached over our heads and pulled down the steel bar before scooting a tad bit closer to Liam. To be honest I was scared shitless of heights, but there was no turning back.

The ride controller switched a huge green knob to the left and the ferris wheel jolted a few times before slowly lifting us up into the air.

“Look at the view!” I said excitedly looking down at the park.

“Awesome right?” Liam asked amazed.

“Yes it’s so beautiful!” I swooned.

“Yeah it really is.” Liam whispered. I turned my head around and saw him staring at me. There was an easy feeling of tension floating between us and I didn’t like the way it pushed my thoughts to the forbidden territory of my mind.  

“Aha stop looking at me like that boy.” I said slapping his shoulder before looking back out in front of me.

Liam sighed then averted his eyes from me and back out to the evening sky.

Chris

It was about ten thirty and I had just arrived at Fallen Angels with my nigga Aaron who lived in the dorm across from me.

“This bitch is live bro.” he said as we entered the night scene.

“Hell yeah.” I responded. I whipped out my cell phone and texted Eva that we made it.

Aaron and I walked around in the club and found an open table to sit down at. All around us half naked girls were either dancing or serving drinks to the customers. In the center of the room was the stage with about four poles attached to it. A bright pink light beamed off the stage and music bumped loudly through the speakers.

“Hello boys, how may I help you?” A caramel skinned girl stood seductively infront of us, her titties completely falling out of her school girl outfit.

“U-uh we good for right now.” I stuttered. She licked her lips and opened her mouth to speak again.

“Just holler when you need something. My name is Candy by the way.” She said to us.

“O-o-okay.” I stumbled.

Candy smiled sweetly before turning around and walking away but not before we got a good look at her ass. Beside me I heard Aaron mutter a “shit” and I laughed at him as he put his hands over his crotch.

“Damn nigga how you hard already? The bitch barely said two words to us!”

“I know nigga but I love strippers bro you don’t even understand.” He said.

I rolled my eyes and focused on the stage.

“Gentleman welcome XTC!”

The speakers pumped something I didn’t recognize as a curvaceous girl emerged from the shadows. I couldn’t get a good look at her face because the lights were still dim but I couldn’t make out enough to see her outfit. She was wearing a bikini top that barely covered her upper half and a g-string. 

As the music grew louder and faster,  “XTC” swung around on the pole doing all types of tricks. Her legs wrapped tightly around the pole and she let her hands free as she slid downwards in a spiral. Once she made it to the bottom of the pole she wrapped her hands around it and pulled her legs down before sliding into a split.

Her ass bounced with the bass of the music and she did one more trick before ripping her bikini top off. As soon as the top hit the floor the light flashed brightly revealing her face.

“EVA!” I yelled out but she didn’t hear me.

“Bro you know her?” Aaron asked in disbelief.

All I could do was shake my head up and down while keeping my eyes glued to the stage.

No Chris look away.

I tried to tear my eyes away from the stage but somehow I found myself staring back up at the poles.

Goddamn to only have danced for a couple of months she was hella good. Fuck what am I doing? Why the hell am I even here?

Again I tried to look away but the way her hips moved hypnotized me and I found my dick growing larger inside of my pants.

This was going to be a long night.

Serenity

“Okay put me down!!” I giggled. Liam had given me a piggy back ride up to my dorm and we had finally made it inside of my room.

“You asked for it!” He swung me around pushed me off so that I feel back into my bed my head bouncing on the pillows.

“Liam!!” I chuckled. He laughed then came and sat down on my bed.

“I had fun.” I said truthfully.

“Yeah me too, reminds me of old times.” He confessed. 

I smiled brightly at him but he only returned a weak one.

“What’s wrong?” I said nudging him with my shoulder.

“I love you so much Serenity.”

I giggled then patted his hand.

“Of course you do! I love you too!” I said.

“No. I don’t think you get it… I love you.” He said again staring at me.

Oh fuck, not the stare down again.

Liam placed his hand on my cheek and moves his face in close to mine.

“Please Liam.” I whispered. He continued to move in closer to my face and oddly I didn’t tear away.

He licked his lips and I felt an electric shock float in between us. Just like old times, my heart fluttered as he carried on looking deeply into my eyes.

“Please.” I whispered one more time.

He sighed heavily before pulling away and digging for something in his pocket.

“W-what are you doing?” I asked.

“Serenity, I’ve told you plenty of times before that I still love you and before we broke up I wanted to give you something but I never got the chance.”

I stared blankly at him as he pulled out something shiny.

“What is that?”

Liam ignored me and opened his mouth to speak.

“My love for you will never cease and I can’t imagine my life without you. Ever since I walked out on you, I spent a lot of time to myself thinking about what I could do differently. I always knew that you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with so before we broke up I got you this ring…”

Liam opened his hand revealing a sterling silver ring with crystals engraved all around it. My eyes grew wide as I stared down at the ring never letting my eyes meet his.

“Liam I d—“

“Don’t freak, it’s a promise ring…I-I want you to have it.” He said.

“N-no.” I said shaking my head back and forth. He ignored me again and took my hand in his and slid the cool piece of jewelry onto my middle finger on my right hand.

My mouth fell open at the way it reflected off the moons light. The ring was beautiful and I could feel my heart leap in excitement.

“I’m with Chirs Liam I can’t keep this.” I said softly.

“Shh. Don’t speak please, j-just let me have this moment please.” He pleaded before pulling my head into his shoulder.

 What the hell just happened?

Cloud Nine- Chapter 17: Can I Get A Refill?

Chapter 17 

Chris

Serenity was looking too sexy this morning but I just wasn’t in the mood as crazy as that sounded. Plus I didn’t want to look stupid if I couldn’t get it up so I just left.

Right now, I’m in Biology and I am so close to falling asleep. The only things keeping me up are thoughts of Serenity and what happened last night.

Unfortunately, the thoughts I’m thinking right now aren’t what I want them to be. The sex was great, fuck it was more than great it was spectacular but I didn’t feel any special emotions like I did when me and Scarlett fucked.

Damn, I love Serenity and everything but maybe we’re just better off as friends. To be honest I just wanted to do this whole boyfriend girlfriend shit to make her happy. This isn’t the first time I’ve felt….empty. Sometimes when she kisses me I try so hard to have that moment when sparks fly and my stomach turns but shit don’t happen.

At first, I thought it was because we were transitioning from friend stage to lovers but after a while I always found myself falling back into the “best friend” frame of mind and it isn’t until we touch or kiss each other do I remember we’re together.

I love Serenity with all my heart but maybe my love for her will always just be friendly love. She is beautiful and smart but she don’t deserve me.

“Mr. Brown.” The teacher tapped a ruler on the chalk board and I snapped back into reality.

“Yea?”

“Did you get a test?”

What the fuck is this bitch talking about?

“What test?” I chuckled nervously, I aint studied shit in the past two or so weeks so if we got a test my ass is failing.

The teacher turned her wrinkled face into a frown and shook her head back and forth before throwing a test across my desk.

“You all have an hour and half, use it wisely.” Then with that she returned to her chair and stuck her nose into a magazine.

I sighed heavily then looked down at my test.

What the fuck is this shit? I flipped through every page and started with the multiple choice but it wasn’t long before my mind reverted back to Serenity.

I wish I could stop thinking like this because I want to be with her but my heart aint in it. Yeah I stick up for her and shit and sometimes I’m overly protective but that’s just how the fuck I am about people I care about.

I aint gone lie, while we were having sex I did think about Eva for a split second. But only for a SECOND. I don’t know if it’s because I just talked to her a few hours before or if  I wished it was her even though I just met the girl.

I thought that having sex with Serenity would seal the deal and make me finally see her as a woman but in all actuality I still saw her as a friend.

I’ve always saw her as a friend through everything but I never really faced my thoughts about it. I just put on a fake ass front and tried to get over it but after last night I don’t know if we can keep this going.

Only thing is if I end it she’ll never speak to me again and I don’t want that.

Fuck my life, I hate having wish washy thoughts about her and I really hoped that last night would straighten things out but it just confused the fuck out of me.

Serenity

I doodled Chris and I’s name in my journal while the teacher blabbed on about a project that we needed to complete by next Friday.

“Okay now for partners.” The teacher said loudly then dug in his desk and yanked out a stack of papers before handing them to the assistant.

“Since this class is small and uneven there will be five groups of three and one group of two.” The teacher assistant said aloud.

Me and Avery glanced over at each other and crossed our fingers. I fucking hate group projects because I’m always stuck with the half-asser and my grade suffers. At least with Avery I can yell at her to do her shit.

Tragically for me, Liam is in this class too and I am praying to God that we aren’t partners. This whole class time I just ignored him and his multiple glances in my direction.

Bitch nigga. I hate his ass but I’m done with that chapter, Chris is my life now.

 “Jacob, Yasmin, Heather. Group 1.”  A bunch of chairs screeched against the tile floor as they joined in a small circle.

“Taylor, Felipe, Victor; Group 2.  Deliah, Xavier Avery; Group 3.”

Damn it! I lightly banged my hand on the desk and Avery blew me a kiss and a sad face. I shrugged then crossed my fingers below the desk. I swear me and Liam better not be the pair of two or else I will lose my fucking mind.

“George, Yanna, David; Group 4. Oliva, Penelope and…. Please excuse me.” The teacher assistant whipped out his phone and tapped on to it swiftly before placing it back into his pocket.

“Like I was saying, Olivia, Penelope and Carson; Group 5. Which leaves Serenity and Liam for the group of two. I’m about to pass around your assigned topics and afterwards  you may leave.

Oh hell no. I threw my head into my hands and laid down on the desk. I was not about to acknowledge Liam, especially after he left me at the hospital.

The bastard didn’t even attempt to call and apologize to me; now I had to spend the next two weeks working with his ass.

“Yo.”

Liam was sitting beside me and he tapped my shoulder. I sighed then lifted my head with a blank expression.

“Look, we’re only partners and that’s it. Any other shit is irrelevant just stay focused on the project please.” I begged.

The teacher’s assistant still hadn’t passed the topics and I wished he hurry the fuck up so I could leave.

“Serenity, I’m sorry. I was scared as hell and I didn’t know how to respond aight? Cut me some slack.” He scoffed.

I looked him up and down, my eyes traveling his body before I smacked my lips. He had changed since I last saw him, his grew out his hair and beard. His physique was more muscular it seemed and he even changed his cologne.

“You are a grown ass man, you should have just said how you felt instead of  doing that immature shit and leaving. I am nineteen years old and I refuse to let anybody tell me what the hell I can and can’t do! As my then boyfriend you were to support whatever decision I made not leave like a coward. Fuck you Liam, that shit hurt. How do you think it made me feel to wake up from surgery and I didn’t see you waiting there? Shit broke my heart.”

I didn’t realize it but a tear was streaming from my eye.

Liam looked at me like a sad puppy before wiping away my tear.

“That don’t make up for the shit you did.” I spat. If he really thought wiping away a tear was going to fix anything he was wrong.

He nodded then opened his mouth to speak.

“Again, I’m sorry and I just want to start fresh. Believe it or not, you never left my mind.”

I rolled my eyes then packed my shit up. I really didn’t want to hear any more lame excuses from him. Just as I was about to leave, Liam held onto my wrist pulling me back.

“What?” I said annoyed.

“Just stay. You aint even get the topic yet, plus we gotta face this shit sometime.”

I threw my backpack back onto the ground and crossed my leg over the other one.

Liam didn’t say anything he just continued to stare at me. Shit was awkward and I was about to leave again.

“Well?” I rolled my eyes and snapped my fingers in front of his face.

“Drop the attitude.”

“Shut the hell up.” I fired back.

Liam just sighed then rubbed his hands together.

“You with that nigga now?”

What kind of question was that? Of course I was.

“Yeah why does it matter?”

 “Just wanna know who fucking you that’s all.”

I cocked my head to the side and raised an eyebrow. Why the fuck does he care? It’s none of his business anyway.

“How you even know we fucked?”

Liam curled his lips into a small smile and stared intently at me.

“I see it in your eyes, you always have this look on your face the morning after you get some. You did it when you was with me.”

 I shrugged my shoulders, then clasped my hands in my lap.

“He better than me?”

“What the fuck?”

“I wanna know.” Liam said seriously. He really needed to back off with all these personal ass questions.

“I’m not telling.” I said stubbornly.

He just stared at me blankly, then blinked his eyes a few times.

“Can we please start fresh? I miss being with you. Let me take you out for a milkshake.” He said changing the subject.

“Don’t you understand? I’m with Chris now so any thoughts about us being together can go out the window.”

He raised his hands in surrender.

“Stop being so fucking hostile, not once did I say: Serenity I want to be your man, now did I? No. All I’m saying is I want you back in my life.”

“Well I would have never left if you didn’t fuck up!”

Past feelings started to bubble inside of me and I was not here for this shit.

“I’m trying to patch shit up with you. Let’s make a deal, you go out with me to talk and if afterwards you want me out of your life for good tell me and I will grant your wish. But we can’t just act like nothing happened. I need closure and I’m sure you do too.”

He was right, we needed to end this bullshit once and for all. I’ll go with him but I already know I’m not letting him back in my life. Like I said before, that chapter in my life is finished and I have no intentions of opening it back up.

***

“Haha, and you remember that time we went to the zoo….”

“…and the monkey shitted on my new pair of J’s? Oooh I was pissed the fuck off I wanted to stab that thing. I had to walk around smelling like monkey shit for the rest of the day.”

I put my hands over my stomach and doubled over in laughter at the memory of that day. Liam and I, to my surprise, were actually getting along and enjoying each other. Conversation came naturally between us and it was easy for me to remember why I loved his companionship so much. We had so many things in common and there was never an awkward moment for us until recently after he left me but now we were back to our old ways. At first it was weird talking about our feelings but I’m glad we got it out in the open.

“Thanks for taking me here.” I said sipping into the large cup. Me and Liam were sharing a huge chocolate chip cookie dough milkshake with extra whip cream.

Fun, kiddy like music pumped softly throughout the ice cream parlor and little kids ran about in the inside playground with their mothers hot behind them trying to wipe at their sticky faces.

The walls were plastered in ponies, cupcakes and cute little anime characters holding ice cream cones.

As I was sucking from my end of the straw, Liam placed his lips over his end and we sucked from the cup that stood between us.

This was a little questionable but shit was expensive seeing as how it was the best ice cream shop in town.

“No prob bob.” He smiled then bit into his red velvet cupcake.

“You got a little..” I giggled while pointing to the side of his lips. White crème hung on the corner of his mouth and I took a napkin from the dispenser.

“Did I get it?” His tongue licked at his face but he missed it every time.

“Nooo, let me do it silly!”

I got out of my seat and walked over to his side before raising the napkin to his face. My hands moved up and down as I wiped away the delicious cream. While I was wiping his face, Liam’s eyes never left me and his hand fell on top of mine.

My attention averted from his face to his eyes and suddenly I was feeling some type of way.

“I can’t.” I said taking my hand away and sitting back down.

“Can’t what?” he asked clueless.

“Don’t play stupid, you know I hate that shit.”

“Aight fine, but don’t tell me you aint felt nothing between us this whole time.”

I looked down at my lap and played with my fingers. I must admit, I was happy to be here with him but I’m not sure if I was ready to be friends with him.

“I’m not gonna lie, I did feel a connection but not the one you’re hoping for. We w—“

“Serenity stop bullshitting. Just be real.” He said impatiently.

I sighed giving in then looked him in the eyes.

“Don’t call me after eight o clock because anytime after that is boyfriend time, no touching, no pet names, and only one armed hugs….”

I started listing off a set of guidelines for him to follow. If we were going to be friends and nothing else then the record needed to be set straight early on.

Liam’s medium sized lips pulled back into a smile and he got up to hug me.

“Come here you! I know you missed me!”

His big muscular arms wrapped tightly around me body.

“I said one armed hugs only!!!” I laughed while trying to fight him off.

He just squeezed me tightly and laughed with me. Maybe taking a step back into my past isn’t a bad thing. Plus I gotta remember my time is limited and I want to be remembered in a good light.

“When’s your next treatment?” Liam asked as he sat back down.

“Tomorrow, want to come?”

At first he hesitated then certainty fell over him.

“Yeah, I’d love to.”

Cloud Nine- Chapter 16 Part 2: Late Nights & Early Mornings